The Useless Critic 2.0

See you in 2011. 35. Neil Young - Angry World 34. Ciara - Lose My Mind 33. Darkthrone - Those Treasures will Never Befall You 32. Cam'ron feat Young Dro & Vado - They Holla Ayoo 31. Ciara - Blauw 30. Vistoso Bosses - All Pink Everything 29. Fabolous & Chris Brown - Deuces Remix 28. Colette Carr - Weird Science 27. Ciara - Ride 26. Justin Bieber - Baby 25. Waka Flocka Flame - No Hands 24. Colette Carr - Bitch Like Me 23. Robyn - In My Eyes 22. Fabolous - Oh Let's Do It 21. Rocko - Lingo Remix 20. Ciara - Basic Instinct (U Got Me) 19. Fabolous ft. Cam'ron & Vado - Body Bag 18. Robyn - None of Dem 17. Colette Carr - Fruit Coctails 16. Wale - The Kramer 15. Wiz Khalifa - Black and Yellow 14. Ciara - Pretty Girl Swag 13. Natalia Kills - Zombie 12. Jim Jones - Gretzky Remix 11. Ciara - Gimme Dat 10. Robyn - Love Kills 9. Soulja Boy - Pretty Boy Swag 8. Willow Smith - Whip My Hair 7. Robyn feat. Snoop Dogg - U Should Know Better 6. Tyga - Well Done 5. Robyn - Indestru...

I'm glad I pre-wrote some of these but after I get half-way through I'm screwed. 23. Robyn - In My Eyes You really can't go wrong with anything from Body Talk 2. She's since released two more albums, but after all the math is done it really only amounts to four more songs. Body Talk 2 is the current pinnacle of her catalog, and this is the track that introduces you to it. She didn't put it on the full-length version of Body Talk, which is ridiculous because it's better than both "Hang with Me" and "Dancing on My Own." 22. Fabolous - Oh Let's Do It I ran out of Cam'ron stuff to download so I started downloading Fabolous mixtapes. Right now, probably one of my favorite dudes to just listen to plenty o' tracks by. 21. Rocko - Lingo Remix Rocko wants to tell you what all his secret gangster slang stands for. It's like Urban Dictionary in audio format. Cam'ron & E-40 supply additional definitions on this remixed versi...

I am sick I am sick I am sick 26. Justin Bieber - Baby In 2010, Justin Bieber dropped My World 2.0 and boatloads of 14-year-old girls had heart palpatations. If you watch carefully, you can even catch Drake marveling at Bieber's player status from the sidelines. Ludacris lends some rhymes for about 30 seconds. They're fine, if superfluous. Bieber already nailed this one solidly to the wall of jams. 25. Waka Flocka Flame - No Hands While I find it almost impossible to listen to more than three or four tracks from Flockavelli, the Roscoe Dash hook on this is great. His verse isn't bad either, not to mention Wale's, who seems more than solid on everything other than his major label debut. 24. Colette Carr - Bitch Like Me This is the second Colette Carr single, but "Back it Up" was released in 2009 and I'm trying to follow the rules. When I first saw this, I figured it was derivative of the then-current Ke$ha/Dr. Luke fad, which at the time suited me jus...

29. Fabolous & Chris Brown - Deuces Remix In May, Chris Brown and Tyga put out a mixtape called Fan of a Fan which I downloaded but never listened to. But I did listen to a mixtape by Fabolous called Coco Loso with this version. 28. Colette Carr - Weird Science Colette Carr is an 18-year-old girl from Malibu with multicolored hair who got her break freestyling onstage at a Game concert before he showed up at the venue. 27. Ciara - Ride "Ride" is the lead single from Basic Instinct. It was banned on BET for sexual dancing, sexual outfits, and Ludacris. It's on the slow jam side, but some of CiCi's best dance moves are in this video.

32. Cam'ron feat Young Dro & Vado - They Holla Ayoo Since the Dipset falling out in 2007, Vado has been on a lot of Cam'ron tracks, mostly those in the Boss of All Bosses series. The most insufferable part of this series is the fact that each track is watermarked with DJ drops that are far louder than the normal track volume. Individually there are probably a lot of good songs on the tapes, but it's so hard to listen to the ear-crunching DJ drops track after track that I usually move on to other Cam. "They Holla Ayoo" stands out despite the the DJ meddling. 31. Ciara - Blauw Here's another CiCi track the leaked leading up to Basic Instinct. It never made it to the album, which is a shame because it's got a great hook, and Basic Instinct's kind of short anyway. 30. Vistoso Bosses - All Pink Everything The media fauxgles who brought you Soulja Boy, Collipark Music, are back to bring you a pair of 17-year-old girls rapping over his beats on their deb...

Well, Brittany is doing this, and I figure if you can't stop her from doing something, you might as well do a third-rate knockoff of it. There are two tracks in my list that aren't hip-hop, pop, or r&b, and they're both in this list. So pardon me if the list seems to start out with fewer jams than anticipated, but they will be coming in due time. 35. Neil Young - Angry World In 2010, Neil released his most stripped-down electric album, which sounds closer to drone doom than anyone would've anticipated. The riff on the refrain is great. 34. Ciara - Lose My Mind Ciara was supposed to release a Basic Instinct mixtape leading up to the album's release, but considering it will be released in nine days I don't see it happening. This song is theoretically on it, as are some others that will come later. They're also available on the Dat Piff mixtapes I posted earlier. 33. Darkthrone - Those Treasures will Never Befall You I have to give the devil his due. Bl...