The Useless Critic 2.0

Picture the scene: Surrounded on all sides you draw your enchanted long sword from it's scabbard, eying up the four bandits surrounding you for their greatest threat. You decide it's the guy with the big axe. As a side thought, you notice he's wearing a very nice Elven helm which would not only improve the defence your head recieves, but look bloody great on you. You charge forwards, swinging your sword with all your might, taking the strongest bandit from life with one swing, though taking a blow from behind as you do. Deftly dodging another blow, you kill a second bandit as you step to the side.  Turning to place the final two bandits in front of yourself, you hear a gutteral, bone chilling cry. It came from far too close for your personal comfort. You slowly raise your gaze, just in time to see a 40 foot long beast drop from the sky behind you, picking up one of the bandits, rising high to the sky and dropping the unfortunate luggage to the ground. You stare in ...

Hello again, dear reader. /I saw those pictures on Facebook from when you went to the wedding. You should go to more weddings, you looked really nice. So, a game came out to a fair amount of hype a couple of weeks ago, and I was pretty unsure about whether I'd get it. Now, the whole reason, and I mean the whole reason, was pretty much because of it not being Grand Theft Auto. It's made by the guys who made GTA, or made in conjunction with the guys who made GTA, or the guys who made GTA looked at the company that did make it now and then, and possibly threw some money at them. To clarify, I'm talking about Team Bondi and Rockstar. Team Bondi made L.A. Noire with Rockstar Games, which I guess is pretty much a nice way of saying Team Bondi did all the work while Rockstar funded it. I did eventually get it. Eventually being three days after release. And it is so good. So. Good. There have been times when I've been considering strongly whether I'm ill enough to warra...