The Useless Critic 2.0

I don't think I've done an "I'd Hit It" in quite some time, and so, in order to bring this back in grand fashion, I decided to do it for my great love, Marion Fucking Cotillard. I first fell in love with Marion Cotillard during her Oscars speech. It was 2006? 2007? And I remember how sincere and cute she was. Oh, goodness. I love cute foreign girls with accents. It is my weakness. And a French accent? You know she could read the phonebook and it would be sexy. Do not kid yourself. I always thought blonde girls were my type- but Marion Cotillard led me down some other rabbit hole. Oh, here: Anyway, Miss Marion will soon be appearing with Mila Kunis (not as a couple, although I so wish) in "Blood Ties." Directed by her "partner." Yeah, whatevs. Marion, you just haven't met me yet. There is nothing more attractive than a gorgeous fresh-faced woman. Also, she will be taking over for Natalie Portman in the newest Macbeth f...

So I realize these two star in Prometheus  together, but I just wanted to take some time out of the Useless Critic to celebrate the two of them, because I think they are possibly two of the greatest actors of our generation. Charlize is just incredible in nearly everything she's in, be it totally carrying Snow White  on her own or even Sweet November , if you remember that! She's supposedly dating Keanu now. Supposedly. As for Michael Fassbender, I know he's kind of fresh in the industry, but he's so multifaceted and talented, I mean. He could be this kind of Hollywood renaissance man if he's given the chance, which I think will happen. is happening, really. So, there you have it. They have been appreciated.

Introduction:   Because LizRo has not seen most movies or most things with any semblance of connection to pop culture, I have taken it upon myself to educate her to the "finer things in life."  The following will be a reoccurring series where we document our "fantastic voyage" through a metric crap-ton of movies which I seriously doubt we'll get all the way through, but it's cool. LET IT BEGIN Britt: What I expected of this film was twisted creepiness a la Cronenberg, director of  A History of Violence  and that sort of ill artform. Mostly I just wanted to see some weird sexual things go down in a love triangle (historically accurate I suppose) between Jung, Freud and the Russian Jewish crazy bitch played by Keira Knightley. Now I have reached the point in my life where I could be totally satisfied with a film if Keira Knightley was in it. I don’t care what the film is. I don’t care if it is the phonebook being acted out set to Counting Crows son...

On Friday I went on a date. My second in as many weeks. With the same girl, mind you. I'm not some amourous date whore wanting notches in my... Calendar? But yeah. We went to this amazing candy store, KFC and to see the new X-Men film. That's a movie, to you Americans. I was quite sceptical about seeing it to be honest. I know my X-Men stuff. In my youth (two years ago) I was a bit of a comic book nerd. Let's face it, they are going to change things, and with good reason. Who can you find that looks like beast should? It sure isn't Nicholas Hoult. But hell, he plays the part excellently, and it's nice to see him playing an adult character, rather than a troubled child or drug-addled teen (as he was in the only other things I've seen him in.) All that said, it is a surprisingly nice representation of the franchise. All the acting is top notch. Michael Fassbender plays a great Magneto, pulling off the dark and mysterious is he good/is he bad thing perfectly, s...