The Useless Critic 2.0

You guys, Viva Phoenix this year. Let's talk about it. There was honestly too much for me to do to hone in on the several bands I wanted to see (Bogan Via, Pure Bathing Culture, Temples among other). So I concentrated on the crown jewels for me - GIRL TALK and UFFIE. If you have been reading the UC for many years, you will know I was obsessed with Uffie in 2010 - 2011. You will realize the circle has then become full.  I saw the Mowglis and Mystikal, too. I've seen the former before, and they are fun, but the audio quality was terrible. So terrible I ended up wandering out halfway through. Weirdly enough as well, I saw The Maine? Not my cup of tea, but they played a good show. I will give them an A for keeping their audience engaged.  GIRL TALK was on another level. I don't know where he has been for the past several years, but he hasn't changed at all. Even now that the DJ has become a mainstream staple of pop music; Greg Gillis was everything I've heard and ...

Kate Nash is a peculiar and wonderful kind of artist. When she debuted around 2007, she drew some unfair comparisons to Lily Allen, largely because their voices sounded similar (can’t imagine Allen belting out songs quite the way Nash does, though) and they were both MySpace sensations (ah, those were the days), and their songs dealt primarily with relationships. But where Allen’s songs were in a similar vein musically, Nash has always had the more vulnerable voice. Her songs echo private journal entries, and on Girl Talk , she takes that confessional aspect of her art and runs with it. (Not that I’m saying Allen isn’t a decent artist; she certainly is when she puts her mind to it. But give me Kate any damn day.) Where Nash’s Made of Bricks was exuberant and not a little bit naughty, and My Best Friend is You was more cathartic, a soul-baring brand of retro girl group punk rock, Girl Talk is an energetic middle-finger to failed relationships, fake friends, misogy...

To put a long story in short form, I was in the need of something new. Therefore, I turned to interracialmatch.com To be even more direct, I simply wanted to meet some Indian and Pacific Islander women. QATFYG: Why Indians and Pacific Islanders? A: Because they are the two peoples of the world that have not yet let me down. Who does not want their coconuts cracked by a Samoan? I know going into this site that it would be a disaster, but I decided to walk through their free set up. It’s one of those places that says “Join for Free” and “Sign Up for Free.” If you are familiar with bullshit, that just means that creating your account is free, and the actual use of the account requires your money. That part was obvious, but still disappointing. Although, contacting other people is not a free service, and you have to upgrade, I was still able to search the people on the site. It wasn’t super surprising that this site has nothing to do with interracial dating at all...

I remember reading in one review that Girl Talk basically makes music for drunk sorority girls to dance to. which I feel is true and has perhaps forever tainted my view of Girl Talk, because I just see these sweat/beer-covered sorority girls with their arms up at some kegger in Anywhere, USA. " OMG STACEY I JUST CAME OUT TONIGHT SO I CAN SO I CAN DANCE, YOU KNOW?" in about 12 hours, these girls will have embarked the walk of shame back to their dormitories, where they will order Chinese and contemplate their beautiful hangovers. which Gregg Gillis is indirectly responsible for. and probably a lot of date-rapes. you evil, evil man. (thank you) Pittsburgh has been redeemed for me by this genius. I know he's sort of one trick pony, but the shit he is doing is fun and enjoyable and at least you kind of know what to expect at this point. plus there will always be new songs to disembow and turn into Frankensteins of pop culture. and at least what he...

so in case you didn't realize Christmas isn't that far away or something. celebrate with Useless Critic friend, Sofia Talvik (www.sofiatalvik.com)(yeah we totally have friends I didn't make them up). well I know Thanksgiving hasn't even happened yet, but hey. it's never too early! also, the new Girl Talk. YOUR THOUGHTS IMMEDIATELY.

So for the past two days, I've been watching back-to-back-back episodes of Jerry Springer, and Steve Wilkos, talk shows that center around failed relationships. Here is what I've learned about relationships. 1. Don't date people with bizarre fetishes, that you do not agree with, and that abuse you. 2. Don't take them back after they leave you the first time. QATFYG: What is the weirdest fetish you'd put up?

oh boy! eclipse: http://features.csmonitor.com/globalnews/2009/07/21/eclipse-india-says-demons-and-terrorists-and-floods-oh-my/ AHHHHHH what do you think? bad, bad things to happen? :( here we go: Fiery Furnaces: August 6th, Brillbox, Pittsburgh (not everybody's cup of tea, Matt and Eleanor, but for all the crazy music they make, they put out some very good stuff) Girl Talk: July 31st, Chevrolet Ampitheatre, Pittsburgh (he's supposed to be insane live) Datarock: September 12th, The Grog Shop, Cleveland (moar Norwegians!) The Cool Kids: August 26th, House of Blues, Cleveland (COOL LIKE THAT) tomorrow, for me, at least: NEKO CASE