The Useless Critic 2.0

I heard this song on last Sunday's episode of Girls , and I just had to download it. As with " Hard Out Here ," "L8 CMMR" uses a little too much Auto-Tune, but it's such a fun, summery synthpop tune. I love the lyrics ("My man is a bad motherfucker") and the sassy title. Sometimes I wonder why I still watch Girls , though, since I hate almost everyone on that show. Except for Jessa, she's awesome. Although she's been a real hot mess lately—more than usual, I mean. Anyway, as most of you already know, Allen has recently confirmed that her third album will be titled Sheezus , an homage to Kanye West's album Yeezus . Or maybe it could be a combination of the words "sheesh" and "Jesus." Y ' know, like, "Sheezus! They're making Sharknado 2 ??" In other news, recent Brit Award winner Ellie Goulding has just released the lyric video for "Beating Heart," the song she recorded for the soun...

Song of the Day a.) I'm glad she's back b.) THIS IS AMAZING "Lily Allen Has a Baggy Pussy"

Kate Nash is a peculiar and wonderful kind of artist. When she debuted around 2007, she drew some unfair comparisons to Lily Allen, largely because their voices sounded similar (can’t imagine Allen belting out songs quite the way Nash does, though) and they were both MySpace sensations (ah, those were the days), and their songs dealt primarily with relationships. But where Allen’s songs were in a similar vein musically, Nash has always had the more vulnerable voice. Her songs echo private journal entries, and on Girl Talk , she takes that confessional aspect of her art and runs with it. (Not that I’m saying Allen isn’t a decent artist; she certainly is when she puts her mind to it. But give me Kate any damn day.) Where Nash’s Made of Bricks was exuberant and not a little bit naughty, and My Best Friend is You was more cathartic, a soul-baring brand of retro girl group punk rock, Girl Talk is an energetic middle-finger to failed relationships, fake friends, misogy...

Oh Land, Adele, Audrey Hepburn, Fred Astaire, Janet Jackson, Tina Fey, Lily Allen, Emiliana Torrini, Jonathan Richman, Adrienne Rich, THE ROCK, David Beckham, Dr. Spock, Lance Bass, Al, me, ANN B. DAVIS, Karl Marx, Bobby Darin, Freud, AUDRINA PATRIDGE.... shit! no one can top that.

Well, Kathy Dahlkemper, did you? Lily Allen had a miscarriage. Amy Winehouse has a new song out. Amy Winehouse still lives? good for her. p.s. they found Marjorie GUILTY. oh, the humanity!

I have never been able to finish Ulysses , try as I may. It's more of a struggle. James Joyce, to me, is a phenomenal short story writer (I loved The Dubliners , for example. "Araby" will always have a special place in my heart). Was, excuse me. He's not alive anymore. Did you know that? Craziness. Anyway, two years ago was the last time I tried to amble my way through the novel JJ is best remembered for, years later. The book that any self-respecting English major should at LEAST KNOW THE PREMISE OF. You can make your own attempts here: JJ meets the ridic 21st century HEEEEEERE: http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/4300 I tell myself, every now and then, "oh, I'm gunnah read Finnegan's Wake ." Joyce's fucked-up magnum opus, if you will. But then I don't. pfffft. http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iDaIuVPFHBFzw-cxxlMhc75bOuVQD98RVN800 I wonder what the man himself would have said. Twitter is insane and arguably pointless, anyway. B...