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Showing posts from November, 2012

2 Broke Girls recap: And the Egg Special

After work, Han gathers the gang to divvy up stuff from the lost-and-found box, like they do every month. "If my dignity's in there, tell it I say 'What up,'" Max says. Among the items is an empty pregnancy test box (Max: "I had two free minutes and you never know") and a wallet with no money in it (Max: "If I was pregnant, I needed it for the baby"). Also, for the sixth month in a row, the wig . It is Han's turn to take a picture wearing it, as he is the only one who hasn't done it yet. Shortly after he puts it on, a bald man comes in asking if he left his toupee there. Max tells Caroline to hurry up and take the picture. Caroline comes back from the library with the latest issue of Martha Stewart Living magazine so they can check if they're mentioned in it, since Martha said she hadn't forgotten about them. The girls find a blurb praising Max's Homemade Cupcakes as a "Williamsburg must-have," which makes Ma

Guest Writer: Some Belated Holiday Observations

This guest post comes from Tom Giles, a former classmate of mine. A Holiday Observation where I buy breakfast at.  I am fifty one years old and I work at a convenience store.  When someone(invariably)  asks me to list what I’m thankful for during the holiday season my first thought is I am thankful that I am afraid of prison life, because if I were not my backyard would be filled with shallow graves containing people who ask questions like that.  I used to be thankful for a feast and time with my family, until I figured out that I do not like turkey that much, or my accidents-of-birth siblings at all. Christmas always sucked, too.  As a child it never lived up to the expectations, I was a true believer, so good I was led by television Christmas specials to believe that I deserved a veritable cornucopia of gifts.  The deluge of toys never materialized. When my own children were very small, there was a short time that they were content with the toys they were brought and time

Dexter Recap: The Fillet of Fuck You Can't Refuse Edition

Episode 9: Helter Skelter I just bought some new pens. They’re okay, I guess, just plain old ball-points, but there’s always something about writing with a new pen or pencil. Maybe it’s just me. Sorry this recap took so long to get here. A lot of things happen in this episode that I could have done without. The end of the season is in sight, and I’m at a loss as to what the writers are thinking. We’ve got some dirty dealings and some people bleeding out all over the place in this installment. I’m gonna treat this recap like an adhesive bandage and just rip it off before I think about it too much.

"Courtship Dating"- Crystal Castles

Song of the Day I guess they have a new album out, but this is a classic. Also:  I am afraid of them and with good reason .

Carey Mulligan is Married to the Hairy Dude from Mumford and Sons

Well, I guess he isn't so hairy these days. But I'm still surprised this happened. Anyway, THE MORE YOU KNOW.

"Total Hate '95"- No Doubt

Song of the Day So when we were in Los Angeles this past weekend, Liz and I pulled over at a gas station near Hollywood. I was under the impression we were picking up a Christmas gift for her mom. "Can you check the address?" She handed me the papers. I looked at them. They said "No Doubt" on them and I nearly had a coronary. So! Last Saturday night I got the best Christmas gift ever from Liz's awesome aunt and saw my favorite band on the opening night of their Los Angeles residency. It made me so happy, I can't even begin.  They played this song, which was a total surprise. And also, I don't think this band really ages.

"Liz and Dick"- Lifetime's Grandest Achievement?

So. We all know this movie is going to be fifty shades of DREADFUL yet we all plan to watch anyway. I wish Lindsay would redeem herself already. Like really LiLo. Why don't you call up Kristen Stewart and ask for acting lessons? We all want to see you succeed yet it's not happening! She does look like Liz Taylor, but that's about it. I know Cleopatra Herself had something of a more raspy voice. And do we need LiLo playing Taylor in her golden years? ... I know she is talented. Somewhere. Grant Bowler looks like he might do a decent job as Richard Burton, but I guess we will know for sure after tonight. @theironkurtain (Kurt) will be live tweeting the movie tonight. Don't miss it! "WHO'S COUNTING?!"

Klairkia "Material Girl" Trailer

Check it out!

"I Was Born on Christmas Day"- Saint Etienne

Song of the Day I am banned from Christmas music right now, but let me tell you, you're about to get a month of the best holiday music I can find. U R WELCOME FRIENDS

2 Broke Girls recap: And the Three Boys with Wood

No, this week's episode of 2 Broke Girls wasn't named after some gay porno, although my post might make it seem otherwise. M ake sure you keep reading to find out why (wow, that wasn't at all gimmicky). Caroline is in the yard raking leaves, when Max comes back home with Chestnut saying they saw that cat they don't like. Caroline talks about how the coming of autumn is her favorite time of year, as she picks up a handful of leaves. All of a sudden, she finds a condom in it and immediately throws the leaves down. "Wow, I guess autumn really is coming," Max remarks, before presuming it was the cat who threw it over their wall. Max tells Caroline that they should start figuring out what to do with Chestnut this winter. Caroline is getting ready for her first date with Andy, and Max assumes they'll have sex. Caroline is unsure as she's never dated a poor guy before, so she asks Max what is acceptable on a first date. "Well, I'm pretty classy,

Michael Caine Chill Mix

hi ladies In 2012, I was obsessed with making a great chill mix, because Michael Caine- believe it or not- makes chill mixes. And guess what? Today, I think I finally crafted one down. So here you are:

Guest Writer- Ke$ha's True Purpose?

This guest post was written by Mr. Ben Branstetter, a fellow Pennsylvanian. Dec 21 2012 Not too long ago, Ke$ha released the video to “Die Young," her first single off her upcoming Warrior album. The song is about what you’d expect: lots of synth, a cloying hook, lyrics about partying and celebrating trash. However, the video features a hodgepodgery of odd shapes and symbols, ranging from roughly a million triangles to pentagrams to animal parts. As this sort of thing is prone to do, the video forced the YouTube commenters of the world to break out their Illuminati conspiracy theories, because the financial elite and powerful overlords that control our world and it’s fate couldn’t find a better charlatan for their message than a drunken Trans Am owner with a dollar sign in her name--which of course hints to all the Freemason imagery on the dollar all makes sense now! Check out Mark Dice (“media analyst, political activist, and author”) tear down the speci

Dexter Recap: Donut Holes and Revelations Edition

 Episode 8: Argentina How is everyone doing? Getting ready for Thanksgiving? Going out on Black Friday to knock some grandmas down with a shopping cart in the Wal Mart parking lot? Or will you be like me and have your eyeballs glued to Amazon’s Lightning Deals so you can get a copy of Vampire Diaries season 2 for $10? I ask these things because it’s rude to just start the recap without a bit of banter. It’s like Dexter not knowing what a booty call is in this weeks episode. Segueway! I have to say, this episode wasn’t too bad despi te all the kids running around . We got some major pieces to the puzzle that is this season, including something I predicted way back when.

Someone You Should Hear: Sun For Moon

I discovered Sun For Moon via happenstance. There are such things in life we call happy accidents- I'm living proof- and to me, she is one. She's a very talented New York-based Egyptian-American singer-songwriter (I love hyphens obviously) who you should keep a close eye on the future. Definitely a musician worth the category "you need to hear this." Although she was affected by Hurricane Sandy, Charlene Ava (a.k.a. "Sun for Moon") agreed to answer several of my questions at length. Which is cool! So see below to see what she's up to, her plans as well as why she's been taking acting classes:   UC:  What are you currently up to at the moment? Charlene:  I just finished doing a show in a cathedral in Gramercy Park in NYC. It was a lot of fun to play in a beautiful old space with lots of natural reverb. I think it's important to remember that the exchange of energy between the artist and the listener is very real and very much a part of

BE USELESS Day Highlights

"Be Useless Day" was underwhelming, to say the least. But several people participated and here are their contributions: People Hate Snow I hate the snow, the rain, and the darkness! - Tommie I want snow.- Georgiana  I love all three, just not if i have to drive to work in them. - Ceili I have no opinion. - BK New Year Blows Like LiLo At an After Party I just hope to bed as many millionaires as I can before settling down—which might never actually. Also, I hope  Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23  is not canceled, it's simply one of the best, most brilliantly hilarious sitcoms I've ever seen. Most of all, I really,  really  hope I can make it to New York by next year; hopefully I'll get noticed by someone at Interscope Records. Wait, why am I talking like it's New Year already? I hate New Year btw. And I can't afford to have any more hate in my head, my hate is at capacity. Okay, bye.-  Irina My "Just a Girl" Moment Discla

Things I Didn't Think I'd Have To Say

While you and your husband seem like a nice couple, I don't want to partake in what you do with each other on a carnal level. this post is dedicated to Kim and Natalie Wood. Doesn't she look like Mila Kunis there? Nope, don't see me in there. Nope.  I used to think these invitations were hil-AR-ious. Like, do they not realize I'm the most awkward person on the planet and it would just be uncomfortable for all involved? Like a raft ride at an amusement park?  I suppose these something-something-something amorous couple think all not-heterosexual girls are wishing to um, join in on their fun and essentially play as a pincushion. Well, I am sure girls like that exist, but I am not one. Nope. Not me. By the way, why does the term "PILLOW PRINCESS" exist? Now, don't get me wrong. I'm all for progress and sexual liberation; I just wish I wasn't asked on a weekly basis to do these things. Like, really? I'm on a dating site, NOT ad

2 Broke Girls recap: And the Candy Manwich

The diner is full of people using the free Wi-Fi, but no one's tipping or even ordering. In order to get the diners ordering something other than just coffee ("This is not a Starbucks. And I know that because we don't sell Norah Jones CDs or bananas"), Max takes the wireless router and threatens to pull the plug on the Internet. "And you—that sad email you're in the middle of writing to your ex-boyfriend, the one you shouldn't send anyway—gone. And you—that vaguely pornographic anime film you've been illegally downloading for the past three hours—gone. And you—that screenplay you've been writing, you can keep working on it, but we all know how it ends: With you moving back in with your mother," Max lashes out. She really is the epitome of badassery. T he customers quickly start ordering , but when Max asks Caroline to put the router back in place, Caroline accidentally unplugs it, much to everyone's dismay. From behind the counter, M