The Useless Critic 2.0

Naturally, I grew progressively more interested in The Bodyguard .  No, it's not that good of a film and I know that. Growing up, I always thought the love story between Kevin Costner and Whitney Houston was kind of cool. They always seemed like such polar opposites, which I guess is how the story works. With Madonna, it would have sucked. With anyone else but Whitney Houston, it would have sucked (more than it did). On an off-note:  it was a fairly good ceremony, wasn't it? And how can you not listen to "I Will Always Love You" and not get chills? BITCH HAD CHOPS. I was riveted by the whole thing until Stevie Wonder showed up. I hope one day he is able to see and cuts his hair. I AM SORRY IT JUST REALLY, REALLY GOT TO ME. Anyway, Kevin Costner did a beautiful job with his eulogy. Really, him, Alicia Keys and Tyler Perry were the ones I thought that were the most...heartwrenching? When Alicia lost it on the piano?!?!? aw, damn.  So I (getting back to the or...

First off, I must publicly acknowledge my gratitude for having been inducted into The UC’s official team of contributors. While acceptance speeches aren’t exactly my genre, you should all know that I wasn’t kidding when I said I was unemployed, and I welcome the opportunity to pretend I’m being productive. (Britt Kemp, here’s lookin’ at you, kid.)  When it comes to Valentine’s Day, most people fall into one of two buckets of b.s.: those who celebrate, or those who are hate. Myself, not so much. I don’t have a valentine, but I also don’t have a desire to piss in the cornflakes of happy couples. I’m a  strong, independent, black woman , who can appreciate a holiday for its color scheme. On the 14th, I’ll make probably violent love to myself and call it a day. Having said all of that, my Valentine’s Day Mix is not about romance or vengeance. It’s about songs that I would enjoy on Valentine’s Day, if Valentine’s Day were celebrated like St. Patty’s Day—in which case c...

This post is dedicated to Whitney Houston: What says more about Valentine’s Day than this song? Lady Gaga: Paparazzi I become a bigger Lady Gaga fan more and more every day. This song “Paparazzi” earns a spot for the attractive and also attractively dark lyrics such as “I’m your biggest fan/ I’ll follow you until you love me.” So fun. So Good. Although, I confess I am not as crazy about the super length full version of the music video…only because there are so many moments without music, and that makes me think about Michael Jackson. “Black and White anyone?” On that note… There is one song from Jackson that has to weasel its way into the Valentine’s mix, and that is none other than this one below. Michael Jackson: They Don’t Care About Us Not crazy about the video, but the title sounds so true on Valentine’s Day. “They Don’t Care About Us.” Emo-tastic much? To Conclude: Because one must conclude with at least one number that is not something downputting, there is no other song to rep...

who will be next to go? and when will people stop killing themselves in front of us?