The Useless Critic 2.0

What you missed Nightcrawler .  Some people have compared this film to Taxi Driver, and when watching it you'll see why.  Jake Gyllenhaal is both compelling in terrifying in this unique and eerie thriller.  I thought this was wonderful and I'm sad to see that Gyllenhaal is not in the Oscar race. What you didn't miss Gone Girl .  I got excited because I love 'The Social Network', another Fincher film.  However, I just flat out did not like anything about it.  The standout performance was Carrie Coon as Margo.  I didn't like either of the main characters and found the story ridiculous and disgusting. The Giver .  The world portrayed is bleak, emotionless and soulless.  Granted, this is intentional, but the whole thing to me played out like mannequins going through the motions.  I didn't care about the characters or the stakes. What I missed Boyhood .  Shot over the course of 12 years to capture a boy growing...

Banks, Goddess LA siren Jillian Banks is much more than a product of the recent crop of minimal, futuristic "alt-R&B." Paired with her dusky vocals, Banks' entrancing debut album employs woozy beats, pulsating bass shudders, and distorted electronic effects to create a soundscape that is dark, moody, sultry, enigmatic, and brooding. The raw, confessional tales of seduction, scorned love, and heartbreak showcase Banks as both empowering ("Fucking with a goddess and you get a little colder," on the shadowy title track ) and vulnerable ("Please, give me something to convince me that I am not a monster," on album opener " Alibi "), but there's also room for playfully sinister lyricism ("My words can come out as a pistol / And I'm no good at aiming / But I can aim it at you," on the menacing "Beggin for Thread"). Top tracks: "Beggin for Thread" • " This Is What It Feels Like " • ...

Very rarely do I hear music that makes me wonder, "Man, when is that band going to blow up?" Mostly, my reaction is  "MEH." However, now is not the case. I've posted about The Romantic Era in the past ( here  and here .) I do it because I enjoy their music and believe in these guys. Their new single, "Alone," is one of the happiest/most fun (funnest?) things I've heard all year. I like it so much that I added it to my 2014 Spotify playlist. It's a good pop song, and puts most stuff I've heard on Top 40 recently to shame. But, like Levar Burton once said, don't take my word for it: p.s. here's my 2014 playlist as of now:

I sort of forgot about this band, which was silly of me. Listen to this song- arguably the most catchy thing I've heard (this side of Taylor Swift) all year. So disco. Much nice. Wow.

NEW OH LAND ALERT I just need to tell you how much I adore this song. I'm digging it so much more than anything on "Wish Bone."  "Earth Sick" drops Nov. 11 and Oh Land has promised a sound beckoning back to her first album "Fauna." She's actually been using PledgeMusic to fund the album. (I obviously donated but you all know I had to keep myself from donating too much.) It's very dancey and synth-heavy, but it also plods along peacefully. And the hook! The hook is the hook is the hook, to paraphrase Gertrude Stein/Blues Traveler.  If the rest of the album is this good, UGH NO WORDS EVEN DESCRIBE. (Gwen's new single comes out tonight, but I'm not sure that's as good as this.)

I'm impressed by the fact Keira Knightley - gorgeous, gracefully aloof, talented - can sing! Yesterday, while working, I listened to the "Begin Again" soundtrack. As expected, it's catchy and well-done. That's not a huge surprise, though, since the team behind "Begin Again" is the team behind 2007's beloved "Once" (and Glen Hansard is partially responsible for songwriting duties.)   And from what I've read of "Begin Again," it's essentially a repurposed "Once" set across the Atlantic. With Adam Levine (bleh.) So, that aside, the film is getting decent reviews and I'll probably see it at some point. However, Keira Knightley has been getting some glowing feedback for her vocal chops in the movie.   This was the biggest prompt in me seeking the soundtrack out on Spotify. Even Adam Levine - bleh , again - has some shining moments. I die. At first, Keira's voice takes some getting used to...

"And my jazz collection's rare,  I can play almost anything, I'm a Brooklyn baby." I'm a little obsessed with this song. Well, okay. And the whole "Ultraviolence" album. I feel like one of the fangirls who showed up to her concert with a crown of flowers crafted in her hair. Well, maybe. Anyway! Reviews have been generally positive. I'm glad to see Lana Del Rey finally moved past the critical stigma of her early career. 

The video for this single just came out. You can watch it here:  I rarely state this, but this video moved me a lot. :/

A while ago, I wrote up a little thing on In the Valley Below. They favorited it on Twitter, I asked them if they'd like to do an interview and they sent me their email address. A modern love story. Here is my e-chat with the Cali duo. We cover SXSW, critical reception and clothes. Thanks to Jeffrey and Angela for taking the time to do this. UC: How was SXSW?     ITVB: SXSW is like sleepover camp for bands, it's a lot of late nights, beer, loud music and sweaty shenanigans. (hot) UC: You've been touring a great deal lately- are you a band that enjoys touring? Does it influence you in any way?   ITVB: We are finally at a place where we feel comfortable on stage, so we enjoy it quite a lot.  UC: It also seems like In the Valley Below is generating a lot of "buzz" at the moment. How does that feel to you? ITVB:  It feels great, we're just happy anyone is listening to our music.   \ UC: Judging from the press photos I've seen, it seems y...

You Need to Hear This! Since most of the East Coast just narrowly escaped winter (Phoenix didn't have a winter this year, which leads me to believe the summer is going to be insane)- This is a relatively new band from Kansas City I've just been introduced to. And I'm something of a sucker for a clever band name (well not so much as I used to be, like the only reason I listened to I Love You But I've Chosen Darkness was their name.) So! The band has released a self-titled debut EP, which you can stream here . (I recommend "Mind the Monsters" the most.) They definitely have a VERY lo-fi thing going on. It's a little fuzzy and distorted at times, but in a good way. Somewhat similar to what you hear from Wavves or Cloud Nothings these days (although at some times I was weirdly reminded of Explosions In the Sky? at least once).  The Feel Bad Hit of the Winter describes themselves as "sad bastard rock." I guess I can hear that, but there...

Song of the Day I am the sullen girl next to the making out couple. Sylvan Esso is a duo that recently performed @ SXSW, where I was informed they were crowdpleasers. I don't have trouble believing that- their sound has that cute folksy thing going on that was popular in the mid to late 2000s combined with the distant electronic reverb more popular today. Their music video glorifies bad white people dancing, which I find endearing. Below are their tour dates- Sylvan Esso Tour Dates 3/20 London, UK - Lexington  3/21 Brussels, BE - Botanique  3/23 Amsterdam, NL - MC Theatre  3/25 Berlin, DE - Privat Club  3/26 London, UK - Oval Room  3/27 Paris, FR - Trabendo  5/9 Carrboro, NC - Cat's Cradle 5/12 London, UK - Village Underground  5/14 Berlin, DE - Berghain  5/15 Hamburg, DE - Nochtspeicher  5/18 Amsterdam, NL - Bitterzoey  5/19 Paris, FR - Cafe De La Danse  5/26 Boise, ID - Knitting Factory Concert House...

Song of the Day/You Need to Hear This! Just in time for a limited release on  Record Store Day - which is coming up April 19th - quickly rising newcomer Sasha Siem has released "Proof." The song is an all-too-short temptress, and dare I say it, has a taste of chamber pop to it.  Sasha Siem is no throwaway indie tart in the buzz-pan, though. This girl has talent. Here is, um, "proof." My heart is all sorts of broken for her. BTWs, this is a still from "Proof." Womp womp. She's studied at Harvard and Cambridge. She already had  two sold-out shows at the Royal Opera House. Her producer, Valgeir Sigurðsson, has worked with the likes of Feist, Sigur Ros and most notably BJORK. Bjork?!?!? BJORK. Bjork?!?!!!?!! Bjork!!!! For non-music geeks out there, working with a former Bjork producer is like having Gwyneth Paltrow's personal shopper* pick out clothes for you. Oh God there I go again. I'm sorry, my brain is all goopy. ACK. I wi...

Song of the Day Calvin Harris, when he's not being overplayed on the radio, is pure joy. It's like "Everything is fucking fantastic for these four minutes." It's pretty obvious here, in March 2014, that this is the summer anthem for the year. I said it. In June, top 40 radio will be playing this on loop like that Nelly song. I find that EDM-esque music is like the dubstep of my college days (WOMP WOMP WOMP.) The kids love this. I can see them now dancing to this song and dousing each other with Coronas. As for me, Calvin Harris reckons back to a time when it was more "exclusive" to like him . As in, I'm a douchebag. As in he reminds me of a really nice few months in my life. Then, I was happy Rihanna took him to new heights. But now not so much because this is the sort of music that loses its appeal when you hear it for the 800th time at Wal-Mart. Anyway! Enjoy this before you black out to it and Michelob Lites. Welcome back, Ca...

Hello March! I have a new artist to share with the world (or the 80 dedicated readers we have, anyway.)  It is L.A.-based duo, In the Valley Below . ITVB are dropping their debut album in April called "The Belt." (Alec, "My Childhood Fears" for 2000!)  Check out the song "Peaches." Why do peaches appear in so much music? Is it something sexual? Probably. Anyway, they just would up a tour with White Lies (one of my guilty pleasures.)  Her voice sounds a little like Lana's. Worth giving a listen to. They might look a little like Edward Sharpe misfits, but their sound is more electronic/smoother in nature. I appreciate.

AHHHHH Remember in 2011 when I geeked out about "I Follow Rivers?" Of course not. Well, check this out: "I Never Learn" is out May 5th . Let's keep positive people! We've got things to look forward to!!!! This sounds like it's going to be INCREDIBLE. (I may have wet myself the first time I saw this.)

SONG OF THE YEAR This is like. This is art. I want to marry it. "Fall in me, I'll let you be."

Here it is, the lead single from Kylie Minogue's forthcoming 12th studio album, Kiss Me Once , which is set for release in March. On first listen, I found the song a bit underwhelming. Well, her two last studio albums, X and Aphrodite , are awesome, so hopefully her next album will follow suit. Now, for old time's sake...

This year, Feb. 3 is not just the day after Groundhog Day: It's the day the new Maximo Park album, " Too Much Information ," drops. Yes, like I said before: The mid-2000s are cool again. I haven't listened to Maximo Park in a long time. But I will rectify that shortly, AND YOU SHOULD TOO.  Heads-up for Brits who are not me (ha, see what I did there)- the band has a UK tour planned soon as well.  ' The band just released a promo video as well for "Brain Cells." It's a little more ethereal than what I've come to expect from Maximo Park. But perhaps I'm just not in the know:

What a great way to kick off the year. Though where's the music video, bitch? I'm all for replacing R. Kelly with Xtina, to be honest. Happy New Year, putas.