The Useless Critic 2.0

Here is the shortlist: N.E.R.D's new track featuring NELLY FURTADO. ahhhh I miss her. Come on, I still know the lyrics to "Promiscuous." You don't have game like Steve Nash! "Hot and Fun"- if I danced, it would be to stuff like this. Pharrell is a little genius: Nelly Furtado is so gorgeous it hurts. oh my god. I don't know how I never noticed this before. Neon Indian says how I wish high school was: Metric Metric Metric. I am currently seeking a concert partner for Cleveland. I NEED TO SEE EMILY. I NEED TO BATHE IN HER SWEAT. THERE'S JUST NO WORDS OKAY I NEED TO BE THERE WHEN SHE DOES HER COCAINE. May 19th! I have two tickets! You'd have to pay for your ticket and give me a ride, but guess what! I know how to use my hands well! Bear In Heaven is opening! They are one of those "next big thing" bands! Slow Club is really juts too adorable it's sick: Cara, does that boy NOT look like Pete? The feel good hit of the summer: http://www.y...

I've been to a number of drag shows in my day. Men dressed as women, women dressed as men, inebriated sexually ambiguous audience members dancing up on you, awkward situations in the bathrooms, ridiculously expensive alcoholic beverages... it's always a good time. As a result of my attendance at these festive events, I have a sick habit of hearing a song and thinking, "This would be PERFECT to do drag to." Unfortunately, I've never felt like shaving my legs (and my face), taping up Mr. Happy, pulling on a miniskirt and a pair of high-heels and dancing around on stage while lipsynching to "Girls Just Want To Have Fun." But here are a few songs I'd totally do drag to, if I were willing to shave my legs. Tori Amos - Raspberry Swirl Tori is to the gay community what Eminem is to insecure white boys from the suburbs: she's a god(dess). "Raspberry Swirl" features such lyrics as, "everybody knows I'm her friend / everybody knows I...