The Useless Critic 2.0

If you are one of those people (such as myself) who miss the days of traditional Disney animation, you must check out "Paperman!" I'm sure you've all heard (somewhat) about the Oscar-nominated romantic short that was the prelude to "Wreck-It Ralph," but now it's available to stream online. Check it out- you will not regret these six minutes, I promise:

Traveling back in time to review films is always a favorite of mine, but this sort of feels like that show “7 Days” when what’s his name could only travel back seven days. I am barely going back into the past, but time travel is still exciting regardless. Anyone ever see the film “Minutemen?” Synopsis/Premise/Info So “The Happening” is a centered around “Mark Wahlberg,” and Zooey Deschanel gets to serve as his female companion/ person of intercourse (she’s like his HO or something; I forget). This film came from director M. Night Shameelaaan, coming off of his critically-butchered and Golden Raspberry crowning film “Lady in the Water.” “The Happening” proved to be different in plot but the same in lousiness, but I hate to burst your bubble when I say it doesn’t have a twist at the end. In this film you can see Zooey Deschanel in an epic run for her life from plants that are mad at her, while Mark Wahlberg pretends to be smart. It sounds like I am being really dull and really lame when...

To be fair, I am not a fan of kids movies. Even when I was a kid I wasn't that much. I liked them, but I often gravitated towards the PG-slanted fare. Or, to be real with you, I made my parents rent The Royal Tenebaums . Which my dad hated more than anything I've ever showed him ("WHAT IS THIS SHIT.")  But the whole Pooh series, books and movies and TV shows, has always held a special place in my weird dank heart. probably because that's like one of my biggest memories of those very strange days before I started school and was stuck at home with my mom every afternoon. I watched a lot of Pooh. I read the books, or tried to. A.A. Milne wrote them because his son was sick, yeah? Or they were his son's bedtime stories. In Poohverse, as I recall, there is a big schism between what Disney perceived as his stories and the actual authentic stories. This happens whenever Disney touches anything, though. NOT SURPRISING. But I am not really a fan of Milne's Po...

QATFYG : So this is just a curiosity question, Where do you see the world of cartoons for kids in the next 20 years? Growing up, Some of my favorite things were watching “Ink and Paint Club,” “Looney Toons on Nickelodeon,” "Goof Troop," and even as a high schooler I watched “House of Mouse.” And of course, there were Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries, but I never watched that…..stupid Granny. But the popularity of other shows such as “Spongebob Squarepants” and “Phineas and Ferb” completely dwarf the classic characters of Mickey, Minnie, and Bugs Bunny. So what will we have in the next ten years? Will there be a show with a dog that lives with a rat and plays the Congo drum while the rat is the lead singer in a poetic French-style reggae infusion group? Will there be a princess that lives in a castle that secretly dreams of being a Broadway star = voiced by Lea Michele =? Will they rework Goofy into an assassin that also enjoys grilling? Write me your predictions, Where will t...

Kevin is in a good mood. Over the last two days, I've realized that Kevin Jonas is more like me than any other Celebrity out there, with the exception of Emmy Rossum. So Kevin Jonas, knows what it's like to be an outsider and to be different from the rest of the group. Now it's time that I apologize for all the mean things I have said about KJ over the last year and a half. Nader Bouberhan is sorry for: 1. calling you an ugly d* bag. 2. calling your wife a dirty c*nt suck. 3. saying you were untalented in comparison to brother Nick. 4. telling my older sister not to dress up as you for Halloween because it was stupid. (I wonder when Kevin Jonas will realize that we're best friends, but JONAS L.A. premiered tonight, and I think I will watch more. Cheers Kevin, I will lift a glass in your honor, but I won't drink because of that purity stuff. QATFYG: Would you be Kevin Jonas' best friend if he offered you the job (that is if I wasn't already in place).

I'm watching Good Luck Charlie on youtube, and they blurred out the word on a sign, coming as in "coming soon to a theatre near you." Yeah those censors know what's best for America's youngins.