The Useless Critic 2.0

Last week there were two posts on India/Bollywood at The UC. They came out as fun and entertaining for me; however, there are many dimensions to India that one must not and cannot forget. For example, India is a nation with over one billion people, and at present, 60% of India lives below the line of poverty, creating one of the widest gaps between rich classes and poor classes known to man. With a nation that has such an enormous and massive poverty index, more and more kids fall into category labels such as “orphaned” or “abandoned.” Many orphanages in Africa are gaining more and more spotlight attention such as through Angelina Jolie, Madonna’s appearance in Malawi and with films such as “Angels in the Dust,” yet when it comes to mainstream attention India receives far less on the public media circuit than Africa and China. So many dimensions exist in this populous and complicated nation, and therefore there are so many approaches. There are people like Ranjith from the Balagurukula...

It’s been way too long since I’ve written pick up material. I mentioned India in the last post, and more importantly, there is a hot Indian woman that works near me, so I spent the entirety of the last 34 minutes composing a plan of action. Start Slow and Ease Into It (That's what she said). Allow me to introduce you to........ Operation Khyber Pass: Day 1 So how do you feel about conflict in Kashmir? Day 2 I called Mumbai today while I was ordering a new MATTRESS. I spoke in Hindi ;) Day 3 Do you like Tandoori Chicken, or do you need some more Spice on your Meat? Day 4 With me, you'll feel like the Ganges. Wet, Dirty, and Constantly in Motion. Day 5 I swear, you make me perk up like Mt. Everest. Day 6 Look at it this way, I’m probably the only one of your suitors that doesn’t live in a log hut. Day 7 You know Ghandi was a man of Peace. Well, I'm a man of "Getting Rough!" QATFYG: Does anyone else miss “Outsourced?”

Hello Loving Wednesday; it’s time for something to fall into the spotlight. This week goes beyond the traditional realms once again to shed light n Sanjay Gupta. If you are wondering if Dr. Gupta receives this award simply because he has a very Indian name, you are incorrect. It’s because aside from all of his work on the not-often-worthwhile CNN, he’s one of the few people that can perform neurosurgery in a warzone. It’s rather interesting that his spotlight comes only weeks after one that went to Michael Moore, for the two of them hate each other. Either that or they just like to quabble…I think I made a new word….quabble….I don’t know, but Sanjay is rather entertaining. Some people have it all. They get to be on television. They get to be brain surgeons. However, I have to conclude by saying…..he has nothing on Deepak Chopra. QATFYG: Did you have an Indian Doctor growing up? I know I did.

Not going to lie. I was on Youtube, and HOTTEST BOLLYWOOD HOT SCENE!!!! was in my suggested videos. How could I refuse? So here is a brief recap of the greatest moment in the history of films related to Mumbai. This is a romance between a man and a woman, but not simple at all. The woman reminds me of Carrie-Anne Moss in "Memento" except that I don't want to ignore her. The man reminds me of an average bloke from an unfortunate film that spammed me once upon late night porn hunt. It starts with a tribute to "Around the World in 80 Days" the Jackie Chan version. Then, elements of "Don't Say a Word" fall into action, and of course, I suddenly realize that a great pet name for the Indian man would be MORPHEUS. Because he is doing the Indian Carrie-Anne Moss. The video culminates in that knot of a human bond(age), and life suddenly is too complex for words. However, the music for this video was most definitely the product of Rimsky-Korsakov's girlf...

I am currently devouring THE HISTORY OF LOVE by Nicole Krauss. She's married to Jonathan Safran Foer, another amazing modern (most of the writers I like are dead people). I can't recommend to you this book enough. there seems to a lot of Jewish identity literature out there right now, but it's all remarkable. and heartbreaking and beautiful and human etc. things I look for in a novel. funny, too. the movie is coming out in early 2011, so get on that shit, friend. also, Ms. Krauss just put out Great House not too long ago. have you read that yet? what are you reading, anyway? SMUT? their writing styles are similar. so I have this fantasy of these two married writers giving each other feedback and proofreading and etc. I bet they sit in bed after sex and read each other's scenes and are like "DARLING, THIS ADJECTIVE SHOULD GO THERE." ah! Dunkin Donuts opens on November 23rd. Harry Potter comes out soon and Wenli is dragging me to see it (wish you could come, Eu...