The Useless Critic 2.0

I just have to say, this was of enough importance to me that I put off taking a shower, but not important enough to DVR. You see, Ke$ha would want me dirty/filthy and unable to go back to figure out what the hell just happened. (amirite?) I missed the first, oh, minute of 'Tik Tok' because I was brushing my teeth (...TRYING...TO...RESIST...MAKING...AWFUL...JOKE) WITH A BOTTLE OF JACK (/FAIL), but what I did see actually was a little bit impressive. She did not sound terrible. She didn't really sound good, but seriously, only like, Sarah Brightman and Celine Dion sound good in that kind of 'outdoor mini-concert' situation. At one point during 'Take It Off' she was clearly adjusting to find the pitch but she did so within a few beats and then stayed on key. I read somewhere that she can actually sing, and I will go on believing this until something happens (like, say, the Orange Bowl) that proves she is talentless and tone-deaf (Ashlee YOU HAVE OTHER TAL...

when I was putting together the page of wire news late last night at the paper, I came upon a most truly horrifying story: DIANE SAWYER IS LEAVING GOOD MORNING AMERICA AND WILL BE THE ANCHOR OF WORLD NEWS TONIGHT IN JANUARY!!! my heart STOPPED. it has taken me YEARS to grow to trust another morning talk show after being left, high and dry, when Katie Couric walked away from Today those dreadful years ago. and then this. it's like dinner at a restaurant that is going reallllllly well until your lover announces that she/he/it is leaving. and gets up and walks away with some attractive European. grr. so now ABC has to step up and put someone as equally charismatic, likeable, good-looking, trustworthy, AMAZING as Diane Sawyer in their morning GMA slot. but they're DESTROYING a family! those callous assholes! I know Charlie (my beloved "I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD DAY" Charlie) won't stay but couldn't they get SOMEONE ELSE. like, that one guy that looks kind of like ...