The Useless Critic 2.0

So if you know me at all even an iota you'll know how much I enjoyed "Barbie" this year. I knew I would because I love Greta Gerwig stuff, but I didn't expect to love it as much as I did. And become totally enamored with Margot Robbie. Feels weird to be in my mid-30s and crushing on a celeb so hard but here we are.  ANYWAY, there's nothing I can say about this film that hasn't already been said. I loved every aspect of it and will likely watch it during my holiday downtime. But I wanted to share the "Ken" EP news from this past week and my personal favorite cut from that "I'm Just Ken"-centric collection. In it Ryan Gosling really gets to shine once again with the help of Mark Ronson and Andrew Wyatt. I'm sure you can write off this whole effort as a cash grab but IDC. It's a very bleak end of year so a little frivolous joy and Ryan Gosling being as unserious as ever - but also somehow very serious and leaning into his power bal...

This is a special guest post by the guinea pig known as "The Smores." Please enjoy. Wheek wheek wheek, wheek wheek. Wheek! Wheek wheek "Golden Globes" wheek wheek?! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! "Moonlight" wheek wheek, wheek wheek. Hiss *rumblestruts* Wheek, wheek. Wheek wheek? Wheek wheek Ryan Gosling wheek Emma Stone wheek hoomans wheek. Wheek wheek wheek wheek. Wheek. Wheek wheek, wheek. WHEEEEEK! WHEEK WHEEK WHEEK! Wheek *tears* Rating: A+ (or some kale)

Yes. Like "Rocket Man," it's been a long, long time. but the Movie Man's post from earlier this week inspired me... Ryan Gosling. I'M SORRY WHERE DID THIS URGE COME FROM AGAIN, SOUTH AMERICA? It started after I watched Crazy Stupid Love . Admittedly, Lars and the Real Girl  is one of my favorite films. and I've never seen The Notebook. (well, select parts!) he's just so full of some James Dean/Marlon Brando masculinity that's lost in today's world. I suppose it's the part of me that secretly aches to shop at Nordstrom that is attracted to him. God help me. BUT HIS VOICE. HIS VOICE. OH MY GOD. seriously, I think straight men would drop their pants for that shit. yes, he dated Rachel McAdams for a very long time. BUT ARE YOU AWARE HIM AND SANDRA BULLOCK WERE A COUPLE? GET IT GIRL. I don't know who he dates these days. my hopes: - Christina Ricci (o hay Pan Am ) - Emma Stone question:  ...

Drive (2011) 100 min., rated R. Grade: A Smooth, alive, aurally and visually stylish, and cast to a fare-thee-well, "Drive" is only a genre piece on the surface. It's a lot more than that; a neo-noirish crime thriller, a character study, a love story, and a mood piece that completely envelopes you in its atmosphere. Also, it's sitting pretty as one of the best films of 2011. Danish director Nicolas Winding Refn is known for combining pulpy violence with arthouse aesthetics. 2008's bonkers, expressionistic "Bronson" was Refn's calling card and an explosive "A Star is Born" showcase for Tom Hardy's talents, and now "Drive" is his first cinematic symphony.  Ryan Gosling, known only as "Driver" and sometimes called "kid," is a force of mysterious cool as a part-time mechanic/movie stuntman who moonlights as a getaway driver. He has no real family and doesn't really come from anywhere, but he's lived ...