ANTM premiere: the best of Amber

The new season of America's Next Top Midget premiered last night, and I have to say, it was surprisingly good. The contestants all looked pretty (I know, weird, isn't it?) and the makeovers weren't too disgusting. I'm even okay with the girl they kicked out and how they ranked the photos at judging. It was a surprisingly inoffensive event. Nicole and Laura for the win, bitches!

However, as relatively decent this show was, there was one thing that made the casting episode stand out: Amber.

Amber was one of the prospective contestants. She likes Jesus, dancing, Jesus, and being insane. Can you see the crazy in her eyes? It's a modern-day tragedy that she left before she got on the show. View the following "best of" video. I'm not even fucking kidding. You WANT to watch this.

"I used to be a crazy girl, and that didn't bring me happiness." Oh, Amber. You're still crazy! If only she'd made it to the show... sigh. Maybe next cycle!

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The Useless Critic 2.0

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