Were The World Mine (2008)

Imagine, if you will, that you have the power to make the person you love fall in love with you. What would you do?

Tom Gustafson's 2008 musical film "Were the World Mine" takes this premise and turns it on its head. Timothy (Tanner Cohen) is an openly gay student at a private boy's school, where he is physically and verbally harassed by the rugby team, including his crush, team captain Jonathon (Nathaniel David Becker), and his gym teacher (Christian Stolte). He has no help on the home front either, as his single mother doesn't understand his sexuality and his father is not a part of his life. The only support he receives comes from his best friends, Frankie (Zelda Williams, Robin Williams' daughter) and Max (Ricky Goldman), and his drama teacher, Ms. Tebbit (Twin Peaks' Wendy Robie).

Things change when Timothy is cast as Puck in his school's production of Shakespeare's "A Midsummer Night's Dream." While memorizing lines, he discovers the recipe for a magical flower with the power to turn people gay hidden within the text. Timothy makes the flower and becomes a real-life Puck, making the bigoted heterosexual townspeople walk a mile in his shoes, as they fall in love with their same-sex acquaintances. Before long the town is thrown into chaos and Timothy is forced to decide whether his actions were right. But will he be willing to go back to the way his life once was, or will he choose to live with the consequences of his actions?

In "Were the World Mine," musical numbers arise organically and tie in to the plot of the film, a rather unique occurrence among musical films. Furthermore, the film was cast extremely well, as every actor and actress nails every note - in both musical numbers and on screen; a truly impressive feat. Tanner Cohen's performance as Timothy is particularly exceptional, standouts being his duets with Wendy Robie in "Audition/Be As Thou Wast Wont" and the eponymous "Were The World Mine," with Nathaniel David Becker. Both songs give me chills every time I hear them. (Click here to watch the song "Were The World Mine" performed.) Cohen undoubtedly has a future in musical theatre. As a rather surreal queer version "A Midsummer's Night Dream," the film pays tribute to the original magnificently, and just like the original, the romance is great. This film's got a lot of heart and it's understandable why it has received a ton of audience awards at film festivals around the world. It may have been released in 2008, but "Were The World Mine" is my favorite film of the year, hands down.

I don't care if you're gay or straight or if you like musicals or hate them. You need to watch this film. Right now. In fact, you can stream it online from the LOGO website right here. You can thank me later. (10/10)

"Mon Soleil" - Ashley Park

If there's anything people take away from my piss-poor legacy, I hope it's what a huge, unabashed fan of "Emily in Paris" I am and will continue to be. People love "90 Day Fiancee," "The Bachelor," and other garbage - allow me "Emily," which is at least harmless, kind of goofy fluff (which does, unfortunately, lean into some stereotypes, as the country of Ukraine knows ). I have already watched Season 2 twice. And honestly my favorite part of this show (despite my crush on Camille Razart and Lily Collins channeling Audrey Hepburn hardcore ) is Ashley Park. This woman has superstar written all over her. She's a bona fide Broadway star, and "Emily in Paris" has served as her pivot into the zeitgeist. "Emily in Paris" is also showcasing her vocal prowess front and center this season, with her covering BTS, "All By Myself," "Sympathtique," and Marilyn Monroe. But the real standout performance is th

Appropriate Holiday Gift Ideas for the Single Lady

While some people may see it as a drag, there are plenty of benefits to being single during the holiday season. During this time of the year, there are tons of parties you can attend that you may not have had the opportunity to if you were in a relationship. There’s also not as much stress on you as a single gal during the holidays because you don’t have to shop for your partner and extended family members or stress over where to eat Christmas dinner. Not everyone sees the bright side of being fancy free during the holidays, and, tragically, they aren't afraid to let us single ladies know. Not only are single women subjected to even more harassment and ridicule during the holiday season, they’re also given the most obnoxious gifts by those who can’t comprehend how anyone can be both happy and single. Whether it’s a self-help book (desperately) trying to reinforce how great is to be single or the gift of a year-long subscription to Match.com , single women are presented with

"High Tide, Storm Rising" - Skinshape

A new Skinshape LP is on the way as of October 28th! "Nostalgia" promises to delve into the world of motives and motifs. Will Dorey (AKA Skinshape) has described this particular track "High Tide, Storm Rising" as "the main theme song of a movie." And if you have read any of my prior posts, you know I'm a sucker for anything cinematic. Here's a full look at the Skinshape "Nostalgia" track listing: 01. Theme For Lazarus 02. Better Chances 03. Dreams of Panama 04. Moonlight Walk 05. Albion 06. High Tide, Storm Rising 07. Turn Away 08. Bohanon's Cornucopia 09. Bad Dreams 10. Fish & Chips 11. Dawn I would try to include something about live shows, but the soulful likes of Skinahape simply prefer to record and NOT perform live, which is an interesting choice in today's world. Once again, "Nostalgia" is out everywhere as of Oct. 28th.

The Useless Critic 2.0

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