what the Grammys have taught me, thus far

- that Nicki Minaj looked like a tampon.

- that Mick Jagger still has "it," whatever IT is.

- Bob Dylan? WHAT HAPPENED? (awesome props to Mumford & Sons as well as Avett Brothers).

- who is this Esperanza Spalding that beat both Biebs and the Floho for best new artist...well she seems cool.

- BIEBS

- perhaps it was a result of the alcohol, but I think I'd have sex with Biebs tonight. SO HELP ME GOD

- "OMG"- Usher- I have been in love with this song for a while and just realized what it was.

- Muse killed. Matt Bellamy's awkward shoutout to girlfriend Kate Hudson....eh. he's not getting any tonight. oh wait, it's Kate Hudson. ENSUE AWKWARD PREGNANCY SEX.

- Lady Gaga was inspired by Whitney Houston. Whitney Houston, smoking a crack pipe somewhere, rejoices!

- HAHAHA KINGS OF LEON AND MILEY PRESENTING TOGETHER I LOVE THIS WORLD

I could wait and watch Arcade Fire, but nothing beats Cee Lo and Gwyneth for me. or the Nicole Kidman shots. man, I can't wait to go out tomorrow in my very own private womb. thanks for the idea, LG!