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When did Train get cool again? Or....ever?

It has come to my confused attention that TRAIN seems to be making its way through the spring festival circuit.

QUE ES?


did I miss something...?


I don't think this is morally right and I am not sure how most people can sleep at night, knowing this. I mean- "Drops of Rain. "Hey Soul Sister." Are you kidding me?


Train reminds me of unhip middle aged people listening to NPR in between takes on their favorite local adult contemporary station. "Celine Dion!" "Sarah McLachlan!" "Air Supply!" And they hear this song in their car, on their way from pottery class or dinner at Applebee's, and start tapping their toes and abusing their steering wheels and all kinds of weird middle-aged people stuffs. You dig me? (I say this as an unhip young person).

I HAVE SEEN PAT MONAHAN IN PERSON. He came to my high school, because we have had the fortune of growing up in the same hamlet by the sea (Erie), the same high school (McDowell) and the same college (ugh Edinboro). But I remember very well his spiel on stage, bouncing around, as I hid my head in my friend's crotch (names are protected).

"I JUST WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL FOR THE GIRLS," he told us. Words of wisdom! My SOLE purpose in high school, too, was CHASING POON.

insert unflattering high school picture here- fat, braces, etc.

No wonder he had more luck than I did with said poon. Nevertheless, there was a choral concert of his greatest hits ("Drops of Jupiter") that followed and also his large/ugly/obnoxious hummer was parked directly outside. AND HE LEFT AFTER SINGING LIKE HALF OF HIS BIG HIT. Left, with the gift basket I imagined student council prepared lovingly for him.

so! enter why I do not like Train, besides the fact they are boring. Okay secretly the ukulele on "Hey Soul Sister"* tickles me and "Meet Virginia" reminds me of more innocent times. But I digress. Everything else = steaming pile of shit.

...

*listens to "Hey Soul Sister" in private rarely FREQUENTLY

...

so, hipsters! how do you feel about Train showing up in places where Fiona Apple and Passion Pit tread? is this defacing sacred ground?

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