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BE USELESS Day Highlights

"Be Useless Day" was underwhelming, to say the least. But several people participated and here are their contributions:

People Hate Snow


I hate the snow, the rain, and the darkness! - Tommie

I want snow.- Georgiana 
I love all three, just not if i have to drive to work in them. - Ceili
I have no opinion. - BK


New Year Blows Like LiLo At an After Party


I just hope to bed as many millionaires as I can before settling down—which might never actually. Also, I hope Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23 is not canceled, it's simply one of the best, most brilliantly hilarious sitcoms I've ever seen. Most of all, I really, really hope I can make it to New York by next year; hopefully I'll get noticed by someone at Interscope Records. Wait, why am I talking like it's New Year already? I hate New Year btw. And I can't afford to have any more hate in my head, my hate is at capacity. Okay, bye.-  Irina


My "Just a Girl" Moment



Disclaimer: I do not have an English degree or a body of work that would give me the right to claim to be a writer. I have heard writing what you know helps so this is my “Be Useless” contribution. Consider this piece like open mic night at a karaoke bar, not everyone can pull off Michael Jackson.  

Last Sunday, I went to work and then home, only to go back to work a few hours later for the staff-wide mandatory Holiday Protocol meeting.  It was supposed to run from seven to nine but actually finished around ten. I left and got on the bus to connect me to the bus to take me home. 

There is something I should get out of the way: public transportation and I will never ever get along. Right now I would say it stands public transportation 7, me nil. I like to plan ahead because I am annoying like that so I called ahead that day to check that there would be a bus to take me home. The person who apparently works at the bus station gave me the faith-affirming and knowledgeable “yeah, I think you’ll be good.”


After getting off the first bus I asked the driver if my connecting bus would be arriving shortly. She answered “it’ll be pulling in right behind me in about ten minutes.” Forty minutes later...no bus. I finally called the stop check number and heard the disjointed female computer voice spout “I’m sorry...there are...no...buses running...to stop...#2*** tonight...Buses...will resume at...5:37 am.” The heartless bitch. I was annoyed.


I work out way out in the west end of town and needed to get to the middle. I had nine dollars cash on me and a cab would have easily cost $30. I am cheap when it comes to me and wasting money on a cab would only make me more annoyed with the all-knowing transit staff so I decided to walk. I like walking and when I was younger I would take long walks at night (without telling anyone) when I got angry so it was okay. 




(West End Girls by The Pet Shop Boys kept playing in my head the entire time. I don’t know what that says about me but there it is.)

An hour and forty-two minutes later I was home and everything was fine. I figured I would get up for work in the morning and forget it ever happened.

Wrong. My sister told my parents who were gone for the weekend that I walked home. My dad freaked out on me and since then always asks me about the bus schedule when I work closing shifts on the weekend because he doesn’t want me walking that far that late at night ever again. My mom told my aunt who told my 93 year old Grandma who mentions it every time I see her and made me promise not to do that ever again. My aunt also told me to call her any time if I need a ride after work. The general consensus was that it was very unsafe for me to do that.

It was a quiet walk on an unseasonably warm Sunday night. I literally saw three people and a fox the entire time. I am not an idiot. I never have my headphones in at night, keep my head up and keep my keychain in my palm in case I need to punch an attacker in the eyes with my keys between my fingers. Frankly, if someone tries to hurt me I have no qualms about blinding them. Besides, it’s suburban Canada, not the Congo.

I feel like people are totally blowing it out of proportion but there have been some sexual assaults on the east side in the last couple of weeks. Still, in my case, someone would have to strength train on the regular to be able to pick me up and run off, know what I’m saying? If I were a man, I don’t think anyone would care. As a woman, am I not supposed to walk alone in the dark? Are these rules age-related or is this just the type of reaction to expect for the rest of my life?

On the other hand, it is nice to see that so many people do care deeply and don’t want anything bad to happen to me. My sister and my mom surprisingly are the only ones who know that if I have a problem I would rather solve it on my own then bother someone else. So they don’t bring it up because it just makes me angry thinking about the public transportation people all over again.  


-I walk home all the time in the dark with music on. I am kind of a petite girl who looks 18. When I go missing, you will know why. - BK

Sam's


 I've been trying to figure out what to write for this for a little while now, and I haven't had much luck.

 I spent a few hours watching music videos, thinking that maybe I could do something on one, or all, of them. Wasn't feeling it. I mean, yeah, I could discuss the differences between say 50 Cent and Adam Tensta. I could talk about why I like Adam Tensta's videos (which are often colorful and full of pop-up words.) I could discuss the blackface in Fatty Boom Boom, and how it highlights both how far we've come, and how far we have yet to go. I could discuss the meat dress. I could pair that one with the over-protectiveness shown by the brother in Baby's on Fire, the double standard. That leads to "feminism" and "equality" and "women" and yeah all of those "dirty, dirty words." I'm not feeling heavy though. I don't want to pick everything apart. I want to be fun and fancy free. I want to be young again. 

 And then I was having trouble getting my browser to work and decided to watch the new Pink video. That could also have tied into those dirty words. Or it could lead to a realization that she's totally my new secret guilty pleasure. I'm trying to figure out why I feel guilty about it. She's a strong person, she stands for women's right, for equality in many, many shapes and she's fairly outspoken. She makes some mistakes, but everyone does. And I can't imagine being famous makes life any easier. 

 I decided to migrate from my phone to my computer and I remembered that I'd been reading Ursula K. Le Guin's blog. And then I thought that there would be TONS of stuff. And there is. But I'm not feeling heavy. I mean, after starting with Adam Tensta, and trying to decipher Die Antwoord, I got stuck on Pink. And I mean stuck. I've listened to Slut Like You about ten times in a row. And she's totally my somewhat guilty pleasure now. I think I have finally moved on from Shakira, her Oxford speeches, her charity work and her dance moves. 

 I just don't feel like pulling things apart (unless it's LEGOs.) Super excited about the TMNT LEGOs by the way. They'll go great with my Peg Leg Pirate, Space Marine, Bat, Minotaur, Conquistador and so on. Yeah. I still collect LEGOs. I may also have more than one Hotwheels or Matchbox car hidden in my room. I'm not ashamed. They make me happy. So much is working against being happy that I'll take what I can get where I can get it. It also helps that my roommates do the same thing. We're cool like that. 

 I suppose this has turned into a guilty pleasure list. We have Pink, Shakira, LEGOs, Hot wheels, Matchbox, I should also own up to Star Trek DS9 and Voyager. And Disco. I'm told all of my music transgressions have been forgiven. Let's see, what else do I secretly love that makes me feel somewhat guilty…Oh. Those annoying flash animations. I listen to them for hours at a stretch sometimes. 

 I can't really think of much else, so this will have to do for now. 

This was all awesome. Thanks to these kids....we had some varied stuff, as you see! 

Comments

  1. I have to thank BK and the other talented writers who put time and effort into this site on a weekly basis. Writing one article was a bit of a challenge (and not the greatest reading material, sorry) but about 30 people said they were willing to submit a piece and I only see four. That is sad. In the future, don't make commitments you can't keep. There is no disappointment (or stress on yourself) that way.

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