Nine of the Best Dorothy Parker Quotes

I've been putting this off since March. So let's do this! I'm on vacation and that means the UC comes first for a few days. And family, I think.

shut up Norman Rockwell.  you sassy bastard.

Getting back to the task at hand, has there been anyone as vitriolic as Dorothy Parker? No. Never, and never again. Pippa Middleton can only dream of this!

...

MY HERO. and you know, she did a lot for civil rights as well!

Miss Parker is perhaps best remembered for her wit. I say that like I know her. Ha! She died in 1967 and I was born in 1988 so you do the math, buster. 

Anyway, without further adieu, I present to you....

NINE OF HER BEST QUOTES!

9.) If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised.

I believe this happened several times.

8.) She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B. - about Katharine Hepburn

7.) I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true.

Someday, the Useless Critic will be a profitable enterprise. Someday. Oh screw it.

6.) You can lead a whore to culture, but you can't make her think.

I have tried several times. I'm always like, "Lelaine, you really should read more Beckett." And she's all like "I have another STD Britt."

5.) That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.

I want mine to say "BRB."

4.) Too fucking busy, and vice versa.

My answering machine message.

3.) Men seldom make passes

At girls who wear glasses.

Not true?

2.)  That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say No in any of them.

Well I wouldn't know what THAT'S like....

1.) This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.

I have felt this way about several books in my lifetime. 

:D

Feel free to share yours!