Valentine's Day Special: Garbage

Valentine's Day Special: Garbage – "I Hate Love"

Call me jaded or cynical, but I've never got the big fuss over Valentine's Day. Probably because I've never been in a serious, monogamous relationship before, but I don't really care about those either. To me it's just like any other day of the year. I'm not one to sit at home in my PJs crying, drinking wine, and miming to Celine Dion like Bridget Jones (I do love that movie, though). Instead, I could be having mindless sex with some hottie I just met on Tinder, lighting a doobie, rewatching my precious Gossip Girl DVDs for the millionth time, treating myself to a shopping spree... Really, the possibilities are infinite.

Alright, let's get to the point. Valentine's Day reminds me of a Garbage song titled "I Hate Love," off of the band's latest studio release, 2012's Not Your Kind of People, which is excellent – as are their other albums.

Despite the song's somewhat upbeat instrumentation, the lyrics are quite dark and gloomy, and they perfectly encapsulate how I feel about this particular holiday – and my failed romantic interests as well. "Love leaves you desperate and feeling a fool / Love makes you ruthless and love makes you cruel / And love makes you crazy with nothing but lies / Love promises nothing and then your love dies," frontwoman and badass goddess Shirley Manson croons in one of the verses.

During the album's release, Manson explained that the song doesn't hit out at "the concept of true love." "It's more to do with the commercialized idea of love and what pain that puts us through," she elaborated. "That, and knowing that there will be no more torture in your life than really, truly loving somebody who doesn’t love you back." This last part does strike a chord with me. Right now you're probably wondering, "Weren't you the one saying you didn't care about relationships and shit?" Well, I'm human too, dickface! Even if it may often seem otherwise.

Watch Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23 on Netflix!

I think it's safe to say that we've all fallen for the wrong person at some point in our lives. Yes, it sucks, and you feel like it hurts more than it should. You wonder how something that made you feel so good now makes you feel like shit. At first you're like...

But then five minutes later you're like...

Oh, well. Thank God for booze, amirite?

On to happier topics, Garbage announced last Sunday that their sixth album is finished! I love these guys so much. I got into the band when I downloaded Not Your Kind of People back when it came out, but it wasn't until early last year that I checked out their previous albums and eventually became a huge fan – though it feels like I've known them my whole life. A lot of their songs resonate with me in a deep, almost spiritual level, so I'm definitely excited about their next offering.

Give JR a Break

Recently, I've been reading some sites that have criticized James Roday, the lead actor on the USA show PSYCH for an apparent weight gain. But you know what? Who gives a flying fizzle stick if James Roday is slightly larger than he was 4 years ago. Apparently, it wasn't enough to scare away his current girlfriend/ co-star Maggie Lawson. (Who is one hell of a Catch!) And NO they are not engaged. That seems to be nothing more than a rumor, but there is a very high chance of it happening in the near future. Anyway, as long as PSYCH continues to entertain I don't mind about James Roday's waist. He, and Dule Hill, and Corbin Bernson too, can eat all the fried broccoli they want. The last episode of PSYCH wasn't so smashing, but I don't blame it on dietary issues. QATFYG: Are you keeping up with Psych? And who is hotter, James Roday or Maggie Lawson? (Trick Question but idk why) PS: If you have heard any more news on Roday and Lawson becoming Roday-Lawson, send it

No Time to Fuck: The Goldfrapp Essay

Konnichiwa! This is Irina Cummings and I'm here to discuss one of the most brilliant, innovative, and creative artists in the entire history of mankind: Goldfrapp – or as I like to call them , GODfrapp – the fantastique, highly inspirational, and sometimes criminally overlooked electronic music duo from London consisting of Alison Goldfrapp and Will Gregory, whose godly music has certainly influenced the vast majority of today's synthpop ladies, including Lady Gaga, Little Boots, La Roux, Annie and Florence + the Machine (not electro but still worth your while). They're primarily known for their mind-blowing music (which have spanned pretty much every style of electronic music – and some non-electronic as well), their abstract, sexually ambiguous – at times forthright – lyrics which are often not gender- specific , and their elaborate shows, not to mention the amazing visual aesthetics of their work, conjuring images that masterly complement

An Open Letter to the Actress: Milena Govich

Dear Milena Govich, Hey, how are you? What is up? Well, I assume you might get 5-7 fan letters a week, but I hope the glitter on my envelope stood out to you. In all seriousness, I have not been the most loyal fan of your filmography, but in the opening credits of the 2006 show, “Conviction,” I got to see you in your underwear. Ever since then, I have been one of your most active online stalkers (not a crime in all states I think). In the next letter, I promise to include an underwear photo for you, so we'll be even. Milena, I remember even back to the days when you worked on one of those other 200 Dick Wolf projects you did...what was the name of that show? “Law and Order.” Yes, that was it. You made history as playing the first female lead detective on the “Law and Order” original franchise for your role as Detective Cassidy. However, I will have to note your performance was strongly tainted when Chevy Chase guest-starred and gave you the nickname, “Detective Sugar-Tits.” At leas

The Useless Critic 2.0

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