Skip to main content

Guest Writer: Kreayshawn’s “Somethin Bout Kreay”


Kreayshawn’s “Somethin Bout Kreay”
is she going away yet?

by Sarah Mantione

The internet sensation, Kreayshawn (Natassia Zolot), has finally released her debut album, “Somethin Bout Kreay,” on Sept. 18 this year after the sixteen-month lapse from the time her "Gucci Gucci" single was posted on YouTube in 2011. It is a hip-hop album influenced by her eclectic musical tastes and several songs are a nod to the free-style rap that she grew up idolizing. 


The wait for most fans has meant a loss of interest and sales are particularly disappointing. With only about 3,900 albums sold in the first week, it seems unlikely Columbia will be willing to sign another contract with the 23 year old. Her current rank on the U.S. chart is #112. Not the expected outcome for a woman who garnered over 38 million views on her first music video release. 


The album has a decent level of youthful energy and is obviously meant to be taken at face value without too much thought going into the deeper meaning of the work, which you will find barely exists. At first listen, it’s catchy and amusing, but repeated plays begins to reveal the holes in the album and soon goes from entertaining to annoying. 


This is a link to the entire album stream. 


The single first being promoted off of the album is "Go Hard" (track 11). The “lalala” part of the chorus gets old almost immediately. I actually woke up from a nightmare this week where that part of the song just kept repeating in my brain because I’ve listened to it so many times for this review. However, that is not the worst song on the album. 


"Left Ey3" (track five) just sounds horrible. It’s like someone using awful outdated Casio keyboard samples in the background while Kreayshawn does her best to sound tough. It references numerous infamous women (Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes, Amy Winehouse, Lorena Bobbit, etc...) to make the correlation that Kreay, too, is capable of that calibre of insanity when crossed. A good way to explain the impression you get from that song is a chihuahua comparing itself to rottweilers and pit bulls. At the end of the song, it is still a chihuahua that can be bested by an upside down laundry basket. 

Tracks 13, "luV haus," and two, "Chook Chook" I just found really boring. 

"Blase Blase" (track one) is impossible to hear without immediately thinking of LMFAO’s "Get Crazy" because it samples the same repetitive scale throughout and instead of “Get Crazy,” Kreayshawn’s version says “Hey ladies!”

"Like it or Love it" featuring Kid Cudi (track six) is apparently punk-inspired but ends up sounding like something that should have been on the "Drumline" soundtrack*.

    "K234ys0nixz" (I hated typing that, not going to lie.) is track seven. It is an “homage” to J.J. Fad’s 1988 hit "Supersonic." All I can say is that I hope the J.J. Fad ladies are getting some rightly owed royalties from Kreayshawn (and a few years earlier Fergie for her song "Fergalicious") basically taking their original song and re-releasing it with different lyrics.

2 Chainz ruins the tenth track, "Breakfast," for me. “Me and Kreay (dead air), all I gotta say.” No kidding. If rhyming is how someone earns their living, they should at least be half-decent at it. He should do himself a favour and expand that vocabulary.

BFF is the eighth track and the corniest song I never expected to hear on this album. It sounds like something you would hear on the Disney Channel. The lyrics “we could even go to the movies, ride around and smoke a couple of doobies” probably won’t let that happen though. The 12-and-under crowd usually have parents that strongly frown on casual pot use while riding. 

V-nasty is featured on the fourth track, "Summertime." It is all right until her verse begins, where she raps about girls in short shorts and neighbourhood barbecues, because she just sounds so aggressive and angry. If that is her rapping about the good times in her life, I don’t want to hear her rap about the negatives. Her voice is grating on the nerves enough in this song. 

"Gucci Gucci" is the third track on the album and I am surprised to actually find it here because it was released over a year ago. I guess Columbia was hoping to bank on its former popularity. It’s a decent song to play while washing dishes. 

My personal favourites are "Twerkin" (nine) and "The Ruler" (12). They both made me wish for the coordination and grace to dance without looking like an idiot. I found them really fun songs to study to because they keep you awake and "The Ruler" has a free-style sound similar to Tone Loc’s "Funky Cold Medina." They also have lower annoyance properties than some of the other songs. Well, there is a part in "Twerkin" that has a guy yelling “Hello, goodbye, whut, whut, whut, what’s up guys” that got stuck in my head on repeat for a day.

These songs aren’t deep enough to wet your ankles so look elsewhere for enlightenment or soulful meaning. There are countless marijuana/drug references typical to other albums of the genre but no “n” word, so there’s that. A few songs have a late 1980s free-style vibe while others have a grade school hip-hop dance routine sound. It’s meant to be amusing and frivolous. Enjoy it at that level and listen to it in moderation to avoid becoming absolutely annoyed with it. I rate the album two out of five. 

I will hold off judgement about her future career because Kreayshawn has only just turned 23. I barely knew what I wanted for dinner, let alone what kind of album I would make if I was given the same chance at her age. Besides, as Blink-182 stipulates “nobody likes you when you’re 23,” maybe things will improve for her next year. She also has a background in directing, so she has options. I do wish her luck and hope she focuses on the music more than her internet persona if she makes a sophomore album.       

BK: y'all should listen to Uffie instead.

Comments

  1. I love "Gucci Gucci." ...

    she used to work at an IKEA btw.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Give JR a Break

Recently, I've been reading some sites that have criticized James Roday, the lead actor on the USA show PSYCH for an apparent weight gain. But you know what? Who gives a flying fizzle stick if James Roday is slightly larger than he was 4 years ago. Apparently, it wasn't enough to scare away his current girlfriend/ co-star Maggie Lawson. (Who is one hell of a Catch!) And NO they are not engaged. That seems to be nothing more than a rumor, but there is a very high chance of it happening in the near future. Anyway, as long as PSYCH continues to entertain I don't mind about James Roday's waist. He, and Dule Hill, and Corbin Bernson too, can eat all the fried broccoli they want. The last episode of PSYCH wasn't so smashing, but I don't blame it on dietary issues. QATFYG: Are you keeping up with Psych? And who is hotter, James Roday or Maggie Lawson? (Trick Question but idk why) PS: If you have heard any more news on Roday and Lawson becoming Roday-Lawson, send it

"Mon Soleil" - Ashley Park

If there's anything people take away from my piss-poor legacy, I hope it's what a huge, unabashed fan of "Emily in Paris" I am and will continue to be. People love "90 Day Fiancee," "The Bachelor," and other garbage - allow me "Emily," which is at least harmless, kind of goofy fluff (which does, unfortunately, lean into some stereotypes, as the country of Ukraine knows ). I have already watched Season 2 twice. And honestly my favorite part of this show (despite my crush on Camille Razart and Lily Collins channeling Audrey Hepburn hardcore ) is Ashley Park. This woman has superstar written all over her. She's a bona fide Broadway star, and "Emily in Paris" has served as her pivot into the zeitgeist.  "Emily in Paris" is also showcasing her vocal prowess front and center this season, with her covering BTS, "All By Myself," "Sympathtique," and Marilyn Monroe. But the real standout performance is th

No Time to Fuck: The Goldfrapp Essay

Konnichiwa! This is Irina Cummings and I'm here to discuss one of the most brilliant, innovative, and creative artists in the entire history of mankind: Goldfrapp – or as I like to call them , GODfrapp – the fantastique, highly inspirational, and sometimes criminally overlooked electronic music duo from London consisting of Alison Goldfrapp and Will Gregory, whose godly music has certainly influenced the vast majority of today's synthpop ladies, including Lady Gaga, Little Boots, La Roux, Annie and Florence + the Machine (not electro but still worth your while). They're primarily known for their mind-blowing music (which have spanned pretty much every style of electronic music – and some non-electronic as well), their abstract, sexually ambiguous – at times forthright – lyrics which are often not gender- specific , and their elaborate shows, not to mention the amazing visual aesthetics of their work, conjuring images that masterly complement