Second Annual "Bitch, What Were You Thinking?" Awards

I'm giving a local a shout-out this time!

JODI ARIAS a.k.a. Casey Anthony for People That Go To Church.

Should I be concerned people are googling her voice? Why is that necessary? Do people jack off to this crap? God, do I want to know...

I have lied in my diary but it's like usually " DEAR DIARY, I'M PRETTY AND PEOPLE LIKE ME. GOSH, IT'S FRIDAY NIGHT RYAN GOSLING AND I ARE GOING LARPING."

Okay, what bothers me about this girl is her insistence she's innocent. I mean please just fess up and say you did this. Self-defense does not involve multiple stab wounds, slitting a throat, sexually provocative photos in a shower...dear God Jodi!

I mean it sounds like they had a weird, weird, WEIRD relationship. This woman changes her story more often than I vacuum. And that's a true statement; you can ask my pig-children.

Please don't buy her artwork, by the way. She can deal with the sloth spam they serve in prison.

And the weird part is she seems like a virginal librarian. I wish I could stop reading this tabloid junk in my spare time. DAMMIT AMERICA I'M JUST LIKE YOU

In Conclusion: Some People Believe Wearing Underwear With Someone Else's Name On It Is Grounds For MURDERRRRRRR. Don't do it!

Do you think if I sold my crayon drawings of Woody Allen on eBay people would buy them? If Jodi comes off as "innocent" I have a chance!

i read about it every day and want to chop her into tiny pieces with an axe. - Alyssa

Comments

Give JR a Break

Recently, I've been reading some sites that have criticized James Roday, the lead actor on the USA show PSYCH for an apparent weight gain. But you know what? Who gives a flying fizzle stick if James Roday is slightly larger than he was 4 years ago. Apparently, it wasn't enough to scare away his current girlfriend/ co-star Maggie Lawson. (Who is one hell of a Catch!) And NO they are not engaged. That seems to be nothing more than a rumor, but there is a very high chance of it happening in the near future. Anyway, as long as PSYCH continues to entertain I don't mind about James Roday's waist. He, and Dule Hill, and Corbin Bernson too, can eat all the fried broccoli they want. The last episode of PSYCH wasn't so smashing, but I don't blame it on dietary issues. QATFYG: Are you keeping up with Psych? And who is hotter, James Roday or Maggie Lawson? (Trick Question but idk why) PS: If you have heard any more news on Roday and Lawson becoming Roday-Lawson, send it...

No Time to Fuck: The Goldfrapp Essay

Konnichiwa! This is Irina Cummings and I'm here to discuss one of the most brilliant, innovative, and creative artists in the entire history of mankind: Goldfrapp – or as I like to call them , GODfrapp – the fantastique, highly inspirational, and sometimes criminally overlooked electronic music duo from London consisting of Alison Goldfrapp and Will Gregory, whose godly music has certainly influenced the vast majority of today's synthpop ladies, including Lady Gaga, Little Boots, La Roux, Annie and Florence + the Machine (not electro but still worth your while). They're primarily known for their mind-blowing music (which have spanned pretty much every style of electronic music – and some non-electronic as well), their abstract, sexually ambiguous – at times forthright – lyrics which are often not gender- specific , and their elaborate shows, not to mention the amazing visual aesthetics of their work, conjuring images that masterly complement ...

Spotlight/Shoutout: OG Mudbone (One Year of S/S)

!!!ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!!! Can you believe it's been a year already since Spotlight/Shoutout started off on the third Thursday of August? The first ever s/s went to Kyle MacLachlan, and then the spotlight was stolen by OG Mudbone...........the funniest man on earth according to some Youtube videos. For those of you who do not know, OG is an FOC "Freak of Co*k" adult film actor. And yes, I censored the C word, just in case the word cock offends anyone. OG Mudbone takes the 1 year prize because he's enormous (and he shoots and scores), and it doesn't matter if his adult entertainment masterworks are real or fake. His foul mouth is more exciting than many. Seriously, get some google images. height="385"> In other news, Spotlight/Shoutout has had some great ups this year. I hope there are many more to come, and indeed there will be. QATFYG: If anyone has seen his films, can you still drink soymilk? I can't! Happy 1 year!! s/s

The Useless Critic 2.0

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