My Day at Coachella

9 AM: Get into my favorite Urban Outfitters attire and put on a headdress. Ready to party, guys!
9:30 AM: Drink a kombucha latte in a field.
9:45 AM: Call Mom and ask to borrow her credit card again.

11 AM: After listening to the Guns and Roses set (featuring Kanye on vocals), I end up in the 26-mile-long line for the bathroom.
11:30 AM: End up in Taylor Swift's squad. How did I get here? I just walked into it!

12 PM: Am ejected from Taylor's squad. Forever shamed, forever 21.

HEARTBREAK IS MY NATIONAL ANTHEM

12:30 PM: Run into hologram of Chubby Checker. Run away, screaming.

1 PM: Call Mom again.

1:50 PM: Trade my gladiator sandals for flower crown from Lana Del Ray. Later realize it was James Franco incognito.

3 PM: End up coloring adult coloring books with Justin Bieber while LCD Soundsystem (reunited!) plays.

3:45 PM: Snapchat!!!

5 PM: Wake up w/ flower crown stolen. Sob. More shame ensues.

7 PM: Add Lena Dunham to my LinkedIn network.

9 PM: Fall asleep in a Dinojump while EDM plays. Mom picks me up later in her minivan.

Comments

"Mon Soleil" - Ashley Park

If there's anything people take away from my piss-poor legacy, I hope it's what a huge, unabashed fan of "Emily in Paris" I am and will continue to be. People love "90 Day Fiancee," "The Bachelor," and other garbage - allow me "Emily," which is at least harmless, kind of goofy fluff (which does, unfortunately, lean into some stereotypes, as the country of Ukraine knows ). I have already watched Season 2 twice. And honestly my favorite part of this show (despite my crush on Camille Razart and Lily Collins channeling Audrey Hepburn hardcore ) is Ashley Park. This woman has superstar written all over her. She's a bona fide Broadway star, and "Emily in Paris" has served as her pivot into the zeitgeist. "Emily in Paris" is also showcasing her vocal prowess front and center this season, with her covering BTS, "All By Myself," "Sympathtique," and Marilyn Monroe. But the real standout performance is th

"Anchors" - AM Higgins

Here's a nice breezy, almost sensual song from AM Higgins (the solo project of musician Annie Toth) to start your Tuesday off right. Her debut album "Hymning" will be out November 5th on Victorialand Records. The album was mixed by Casey Foubert, a frequent collaborator of Sufjan Stevens. The album "captures the first years of moving from an American city to rural France." Sounds like "Hymning" will be a welcome escape from the world we live in right now, especially considering that Annie Toth counts poets Mary Oliver and Thomas Merton as influences.

Summer Playlist - 2022 Edition!

It's truly the little things in life that make a world of difference. And for me, that means my summer playlist! Behold, I have put together 2022's edition. It includes cuts from artists like: - Mitski - Uffie - Johnny Orlando - Kylie Minogue + Jessie Ware - Florence and the Machine (who put out a fantastic album this year after a long dry spell of kind of "meh" records. Her pairing with Jack Antonoff worked out quite well!) - Bilal - Harry Styles (he has some catchy music!) - KATE BUSH DUH - And of course, Lana. It's also available on Apple Music, but since I recognize a lot of folks use Spotify, here's that link. Enjoy!

The Useless Critic 2.0

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