The Useless Critic 2.0

Episode 2 The Sun Sorry these recaps have been so late. I've been a busy little bee. Moving to Chicago in the fall and putting things in order has taken priority. At least for the next few weeks these recaps should be on time. Come August I can't promise anything. But in any case, let's see if this episode succeeds where the premiere did not in being nominally entertaining.

Song of the Day Such a good song; such a good band! 

And not Beyonce or Justin Timberlake! Here are three coming this autumn to the Valley I'm eager to buy tickets for... 1.) James Blake  October 25- Crescent Ballroom James Blake has one haunting, gorgeous voice. And his approach to "dubstep"- if you want to term it that- I think is one of a kind. His new album, "Overgrown," is a trip to another dimension. He'll be at the Crescent (a cool little venue) in October. I think tickets will probably sell out, but I'm too cheap to buy tickets right now. Get them here .  2.) Vampire Weekend October 27- Comerica Theater This one would be fun to see live! Vampire Weekend come across as putting on a lively show. Sky Ferreira is opening, which strikes me as strange, but whatever. The new Vampire Weekend- while not really that different than what they've done before - is nonetheless enjoyable. Why hurt a winning formula? No one messes with Coke. Get your tickets hurr . 3.) Kate Nash + La ...

Two new songs by Franz Ferdinand came out today. These Scots haven't put out new music since 2009. I'm liveblogging my reaction.... .... Keep reading .... Reading.... Reading.......... Reading............. Reading.................. This is "Love Illumination," which is touched with some Hot Chip genius. I don't know if I like it. Franz Ferdinand, it seems to me, is a band who does not age well. There's another track, too. Their new album (in case you were wondering out there)  Well, their new album comes out in August. So there's that. Here is one of my favorites by them:

Song of the Day I miss Rilo Kiley.

Episode 1 Who Are You, Really? Yes, yes, I know this is a week late. I've been traveling a lot with not much access to wifi. Hopefully I'll have yesterday's recap up very soon. I'll be apartment hunting in Chicago this week! But enough about me, I've made you all wait long enough... Stupid clusterfucky opening that screws up my normal recapping style —Picking up exactly where we left off last season, Sookie and Eric run away from a newly empowered—and naked—Bill. They escape the Authority compound, and even swing by in an SUV to pick up Nora, Pam, Tara, Jessica and Jason (who is none too happy being ordered around by vampires). The Authority compound explodes. Jessica urges them to go back for Bill, but he’s fine. Well, sort of. He walks out of the burning wreckage and flies away. They hear a convenient press conference on the radio (see Burell for more on that), and Jason pulls over once they get to a safe distance, so everyone can hash out...

Song of the Day His new album's just about to come out! This guy's a genius- LISTEN TO HIM!

By Britt Once upon a time , I cared about the Supermoon. I thought it was something significant in some respect I was called upon to give a shit about. I thought: "Well, it's a big  moon." And the way the media built it up! You would have thought the moon was going to fall out of the sky and into Paula Deen's waiting mouth. Doused in butter, naturally. RIP Paula's career Then, last year I experienced my first "Supermoon." Even though apparently we've been having them for years. Who knew?!?! NOT ME.  I went outside- it was Cinco de Mayo and I was with friends- and I expected to see a GIGANTIC GLOWING ORB IN THE NIGHT SKY. I waited for something like a Biblical prophecy. I looked up, over the man-made pollution, and... It was just a moon. Just a full. Moon. What am I looking at? Oh. That. So maybe there are astrological meanings for this I don't fully grasp. And maybe it is a lot closer than it's ever been, but I reall...

This guest writer is Taylor Birk, from Edinboro, PA. YES, I know "Game of Thrones" has been an ever-popular topic on here. But have at someone else's opinion. Thanks Taylor! "Game of Thrones?" More Like "Game of Pain." Painful. That’s the first word that comes to mind when I think of the third season of "Game of Thrones." It’s painful for the characters (quite literally) and painful for me (figuratively and literally). So much of this season left me, and many others, to weep into a pillow at night. And not just because of some of the traumatic events that took place in Westeros this season. Seriously. Some of those torture scenes left me in a severe amount of (psychosomatic) pain. I was late to get on the "Game of Thrones" train. A friend and I sat and watched the entire first and second season in a span of two weeks so we could watch the third season when it started. I regret not watching the show sooner, but better late...

 I saw Eleanor Friedberger play in Phoenix last night. I really haven't followed her solo career, but I was in for a pleasant surprise last night. Her music (outside of the Fiery Furnaces) is really catchy, upbeat, almost like 1970s pop with a bit of weirdness thrown in for good measure. And she's a very lively performer. I was impressed- and too sleepy to stick around for the main act, Sea Wolf. Anyway, I just wanted to recommend you check out Eleanor! She's amazing and underrated, so she's worth your time. And see her live if you can!

I haven't done one of these in a long while. But! Here we go: Be Useful Day is this week, June 21st. This is the second one we've done. It doesn't seem to be this big this time around but that's okay. There are participants in the United States, Canada, Japan, Australia and Finland. That is good enough for me. As long as it makes some small ripple of difference. Interested? RSVP here .  I made a best of 2013 playlist on Spotify. I have to tell you, this is no 2012. Nonetheless, we do have some good hits here: There's been a considerable lack of interviews lately. I know, I know. I'm working on rectifying this ASAP. If anyone is interested in some exposure, just drop me a line. I do have a guest post I'll be putting up tomorrow morning (nice and early). There's a new feature I want to start doing. And I also have a few book reviews for some folks I know I need to work on posting. I'm not so much lazy as I'm just BUSY. Plus, Be Useful need...

Bonus Song of the Day This is for my sister, who is a huge Thom Yorke/Radiohead fan. I love this song and the video- not sure what to make of the Atoms for Peace project as a whole though. Happy birthday, Chris!

Song of the Day A gorgeous love song by Bjork. 

I don't know what big-ass rock I've been living under, because this happened in FEBRUARY. I hear the guy from "The Princess Bride" saying "twoo wuv" Joanna Newsom and comedian Andy Samberg are officially about to get hitched. When? I have no idea. Why? Well, that picture me seems like a like a look of adoration, so. I guess! For a long time, I really didn't like this couple. But Andy Samberg has grown on me exponentially. Thus, I've given them my *meaningless* stamp of approval. Stamp, stamp. All done! I just hope he doesn't introduce her to Adam Sandler. Or who knows; maybe she's a big "The Waterboy" fan.  Here's the new Lonely Island video with P. Diddy, Robyn and Paul Rudd. Why yes! I've had dreams like this for YEARS-

Hey-o. At this point, it appears these awards will become a regular event. The month of June, I've decided to celebrate the  Colossal Ego That Is Kanye West . I love his sunglasses here. Even douchenozzles can DRESS well. I'm sure Aesop has a fable about it.  I like Kanye generally. He's kind of obnoxious but he's pretty talented. He just is one of those people who don't realize they need a filter or to think before they spew words out. However, his interview with the New York Times - HOLY shit. For you. For what’s right. I am so credible and so influential and so relevant that I will change things. So when the next little girl that wants to be, you know, a musician and give up her anonymity and her voice to express her talent and bring something special to the world, and it’s time for us to roll out and say, “Did this person have the biggest thing of the year?” — that thing is more fair because I was there. Seriously: What the FUCK does that ...

Highly influential electronic music duo Goldfrapp have finally announced details of their new album!!! Their sixth studio album is titled Tales of Us and it's due out September 9. Check out the artwork and track listing below: 1. Jo 2. Annabel 3. Drew 4. Ulla 5. Alvar 6. Thea 7. Simone 8. Stranger 9. Laurel 10. Clay And here's a very intriguing album trailer: Perhaps I should lower my expectations, considering that most "comeback" albums released this year turned out to be rather underwhelming—I'm looking at you, The Knife. Oh, fuck it. PRAISE GODFRAPP. In unrelated news, I have a very special post in the works right now. It's cumming soon, so make sure you don't miss it.

Episode 10 Mhysa

Song of the Day Yeah- this is music for people who love to dance. 

Dear Cereal, I have been a devout eater of you for years and I have not had a complaint. I remember flinging Cheerio's at my mom in the chapel at church as a toddler. I remember the excitement of pushing boxes off the shelf at the grocery store. I remember my brother and I being determined to find the toy in your boxes. In college do you remember when I was so poor all I could eat was peanut butter and cereal? That was FUN. I loved crying myself to sleep!  I know the past year we've experienced a growing apart. I eat my breakfast before I go to work, usually hurried in a parking lot. Let's not gloss over these details. I have as much class as a Craigslist prostitute. So I was out buying supplies for my spoiled guinea pigs yesterday and I saw CEREAL. And I was like, well you know maybe it's better if I start having breakfast at home again (you have no idea how much I like protein bars. It helps with my weight-training you know).  There was this box of a va...

2006: I am a freshman at Edinboro University. Having grown up with dial-up, arriving at Edinboro introduced me to the world of high-speed internet. I was HOOKED. Naturally I began to abuse internet radio first and foremost. I was exposed to a lot of great music that year. Beirut, Final Fantasy, Joanna Newsom, M.I.A. I remember the first time I heard the National. It was a rainy gross-ass Edinboro day, which is about 360 days out of the year. The song was "All the Wine." Whoa!  I remember thinking. What a cocky asshole . "I'm a birthday candle in a circle of black girls," Matt spits in the song, like he is spitting right on you, the listener. ??? What does that even mean? Do you know how many circles of black girls around cupcakes I have imagined to this song? "I am a perfect piece of ass." Of course it's a parody, but the light's not quite on in my developing brain.  . I was appalled! And rather bored. I listened to the s...