The Useless Critic 2.0

So in the neverending story of how reality television dominated the world, it is impossible to overlook where it all began. "The Real World" was one of the first shows that pulled Amerikay and the rest of the globe into reality tv, and it still hasn't been canceled. Tonight was the premiere of it's latest location, where 8 strangers live in a Washington D.C. house and do God knows what... Yes, that's 8...not 7. This season on the show where people stop being polite and start being real, there are 4 guys and 4 girls out there to enchant us. So yeah, this season there are some people who will be really interesting and others that are totally fake and not worth a second of your time. One jerk/woman was so annoying...she's all like "I heart obama! I own a passport,but I've never used it." Another was a blonde nincompoop, who has nothing to say. There is also a rather attractive girl who grew up in the church but is now a wild child. And of course.......

most of these songs I've discussed already, so I'm skipping the ones I have for the most part and a few that I feel are just blah blah blah: "Boat Behind"- Kings of Convenience "1901"- Phoenix "Treat Me Like Your Mother"- The Dead Weather "Dog Days Are Over"- Florence and the Machine "I Don't Like Your Band"- Annie " Relator "- Pete Yorn and Scarlett Johannson "Laughing With a Mouth of Blood"- St. Vincent "Crystallized"- The Xx "You and I"- Wilco featuring Feist "If Only"- Sondre Lerche "Daniel"- Bat For Lashes I think Natasha Khan is one of the coolest girls ever. in my mind, I AM her. She's like a revamped Kate Bush. love it. "Seven"- Fever Ray I haven't yet fully sat down and indulged in Fever Ray, but this song has struck a chord with me. eerie and yet ... POIGNANT. it reminds me of on Christmas Eve when my grandma and I watched "White...

So on a completely random and gratuitous note.....the highlight of 2009 for me was learning that Demi Lovato and I have the same favorite colors. The B and R. Black and Red are awesome. Red is not too girleee, not too boyish, it's just real. And black is kickass. This made my year!! Also, we're both Dimmu Borgir fans. ;) QATFYG: Do you wear lots of red and/or black? PS: I haven't been followed her music, but who predicted she'd be huge? ME, that's who. Her latest album debuted at #2 and made it to number 1. I called this way back when.

Sup homedogs? Sorry about the lack of posts lately. Moving across the world, working, etc kind of sucks up a lot of time. I should have a little more time now so I'll try to get back to posting on a semi-regular basis again. Something I enjoy doing is typing in a random word or grouping of letters into the search bar in iTunes and playing whatever comes up. It's a great way to find songs and bands which have been lost in the annals of your iTunes folders. Tonight I typed in "call." Here's a short selection of the songs I heard: Listen on YouTube: Islands - Don't Call Me Whitney, Bobby Florence and the Machine - I'm Not Calling You A Liar Long Distance Calling - I Know You, Stanley Milgram! Eric Prydz - Call On Me Watch: Download: Bjork - Alarm Call (view video above) Call Me Alice - Life 101 Out Hud - Dad, There's A Little Phrase Called Too Much Information

This is where I wrap up relatively "new" artists of the year and recommend them to you. what I discovered this year and what you might discover too! IT'S MUTUAL! LET US EXPLORE Chris Garneau Like Sufjan Stevens if his balls were eaten by bunny rabbits. Good Shoes Just a really fun Britpop band, think a la the Maccabees or even Arctic Monkeys or Art Brut. A lot of Britpop bands sound SO ALIKE OMG. Good Shoes stands out. Check out their last.fm for a free MP3. Adam's girl, Florence and the Machine She's a legend in the making. Truly talented. my personal favorite: SO EPIC Greg Laswell His voice is beautiful- what seperates him from the dozens of other unmemorable singer-songwriters out there at the moment- shit, his talent. his cover of Kristin Hersh's "Your Ghost" gives me shivers. He has a very slowcore thing about him, a la American Music Club. But I gotta keep my eye on him in the future. He's currently touring with, yes, Ingrid Michaelson. plu...

...is Dutchman Jasper Schuringa, aka THIS GUY: http://news.yahoo.com/video/us-15749625/hero-passenger-we-heard-bang-17324097 who I think is awesome and it's not just because he's Dutch! Okay so the explosives didn't work but still. I don't think my reflexes would have been so fast! I would have been like UHHH, looking up from my Cosmopolitan (how to give him the best orgasm ever!) and then POOOOOOF. And so what if he's demanding money after CNN took his cell phone image. I would demand money too!!!! also, I was genuinely freaked out this happened somewhere so close. I mean, Detroit. doesn't that city have enough problems? LESSON NUMBER ONE TERRORISTS, AVOID THE RUST BELT.

In case you haven't heard, Vic Chestnutt, an acclaimed singer-songwriter who was discovered by Michael Stipe of R.E.M., died yesterday. He was 45. I'm not going to claim to have listened to him before, because I never really did. but he was obviously very talented and I'm listening to him right now- there's a very Americana, Townes Van Zandt vibe to his music. worth a listen. http://www.last.fm/music/Vic+Chesnutt/+charts?rangetype=week&subtype=tracks (some streamable tracks here) RIP.

p.s. forgive my last post. I'll delete it in a few days, haha. They say It's coming on to christmas Hello Saferide, light a candle on the christmas tree They say It's gonna be all parties and carols Well I disagree Well I disagree You left on the 10th of december Guess there'll be no nobel award from me Far as standing outside by your window, shouting "I disagree" "I disagree" And as for present, you fuck, I had an Ipod nano With your name written on it It's gonna fit well into my new life listening To Gloria Gaynor, singing "I will survive" They say there's suppose to be three wise men I've been searching but I haven't found a single one Angels brought a baby to a virgin me I'll just settle for some good old fun Settle for some good old fun And as for presenta, you fuck, I had an Ipod nano With your name written on it It's gonna fit well into my new life listening To Gloria Gaynor, singing "I will survive"...

Christmas is that one over-commercialized holiday that reinforces if you are alone, you are indeed very alone. don't fucking get me started on Valentine's Day. that holiday's a joke. Christmas is one prolonged jackoff, yes it is. and this season started out ok for me, as I always can't help but get a little into it, I loved Christmas as a kid because thata's what kids to do, if you are going to celebrate this holiday try and do so in the company of children, but to stay in the mood too long? hell no. anyway, I tried to watch a few holiday movies tonight, ha, but my parents were like WE DO NOT FEEL THE NEED TO WATCH THESE MOVIES, LET US WATCH LARRY KING INSTEAD. So no Elf for me, which, really was like- the highlight of my day, sad to say. because I am not in good spirits at all and I thought school letting out would uplift me but it hasn't. I am more miserable than ever. but it's cool. that's the way things are supposed to be, derrrrrr ! "Baby, It...

Hello/ Hola It was not easy having to decide on one actor that stood beyond all others in the 2000s. To make the decision I could not only give it to one person, so for the first time in Spotlight/Shoutout history the award is divided into two categories. Television Actor and Film Actor of the Decade. Let’s start with TV. Richard Coyle! This was the name that rose above them all. As I posted on my top television shows, the UK’s “Coupling” was the funniest show of all time. And it would not have made it that far, if not for the performance of Richard Coyle. He played the quirky, nervous, and socially awkward Jeff Murdock from 2000-2003 on the show. There is no other person on the planet who has entertained me better than Richard Coyle, his comic style was and is one of a kind. So many times I had almost fell on the floor laughing when he told jokes or was caught in awkward situations. After leaving “Coupling” Richard C moved to the London stage, performing in David Auburn’s Proof a...

Best Animated Feature This could go any way.... Coraline Super elaborate and well-done stop motion film that shattered with very complex animation. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs Super popular animation film, fueled by a killer soundtrack and original ideas. Fantastic Mr. Fox Extremely well-crafted work from the mind of Dahl, and taken to the next level with Wes Anderson, not to mention hilarious. The Princess and the Frog History changing Disney film, where for the first time there is a princess of African Decent. Up Again, another popular animated flick that shocked audiences with dramatic value and character connections. QATFYG: It's a tough one, but who do you think will win? PS: The spotlight/shoutout will be here later today. I wouldn't let the world down.

A brief summary of things as they are: - Uffie has a new song that's leaked, "MCs Can Kiss." Uffie is precocious and kind of twitty, but I love her. the song "Dismissed"- those lyrics! made me love her. - Apparently Billy Corgan and Jessica Simpson are dating. yeah. - I am the second biggest user on Hype Machine. this should give you more of a reason why to follow me (brittnik, as for everything). - I am not going to do any personal reflection on 2009. Public or otherwise. This song will surmise my feelings on this stupid year: Go fuck yourself, 2009! - Is anyone excited for Sherlock Holmes with Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr, which opens on Christmas, much like Nine does? I don't care. Christmas will be spent being torn apart by children again. Speaking of, I have two Christmas posts coming up. you lucky people. Also read Al's TV post. it is incredible! tale care

By Nader Bouberhan Tragic times have fallen upon us with the loss of Brittany Murphy, and I will dedicate this to her. My Top Ten TV Shows of the Decade Buenas Noches, these are my top ten television shows as we say goodbye to 2009!! Here it goes . . . . . . 10. Family Guy Starting at number 10, “Family Guy” revived the world of animated humor, and it took off as a cultural phenomenon. During the years of 2004-2006 everybody was talking about “Family Guy” nonstop, and they still are. Creator Seth MacFarlane also has two other hit shows on FOX and is their powerhouse for animated comedy. 9. X-Men Evolution This show might surprise some as a top ten, but “X-Men Evolution” became a solid and reliable show for me. During one summer, I stayed up every night to catch the daily episode of XME on Cartoon Network. It brought back so many memories of the 90’s, but it was different. XME gave a new spin on the stories and helped connect them to teenagers. It had ways of joining old feelings ...

What timing- this is such a shock. apparently the 32-year-old actress we best know for Clueless died of a heart attack this morning. I know 2009 was like a big year for celebrities' deaths but she was so young and this was so unexpected- it's really a waste. it's always sad to see someone cut down in their prime. personally, I loved her in Girl, Interrupted.

Tonight, I was heartbroken to catch the last of Charlie Gibson's news broadcasts! :( First Diane Sawyer NOW THIS I CAN'T HANDLE IT ALL AT ONCE oh man, I can't believe he's so old. to me Charlie Gibson will always be ageless. sigh. at least Diane Sawyer's taking over. by the way, I caught George Stepfhahanaoekeoeues on the other morning- um, it's going to take some adjustment.

Songs I Don't Have For You To Download Edition! "All or Nothing"- Au Revoir Simone so beautiful. this song perfectly showcases Au Revoir Simone's strengths like noneother I've heard before. their gentle harmonies soar. it's gorgeous. like a less experimental, atmospheric School of Seven Bells. pile on a bit of restrained sweetness (like aspartame). "slowly coming into view..." "Love Has Left the Room"- A Camp Remember that chick that leads The Cardigans (who are like the most underrated band, EVER)Nina Persson? Well this is her solo project. Pretty incredible, I say. Very nice adult alternative. Showcases her vocals superbly. IT WILL SLIP MY MINDDDDDDDDDDDDD - and I used to have the biggest crush on this woman FTW. "Two"- The Antlers I'm really just getting into this band despite much resistance. Gonna go see them in Cleveland on January 23. WANT TO COME? They're opening for Editors right now. ugh, I can I see a semblance....

Hey, this week it's Jimmy Stewart, because well.......tis the season! So let's all watch "It's a Wonderful Life," and feel jovial. Oh and it's impossible to forget some of his other work. QATFYG: Do you like It's a Wonderful life? Did you watch Fivel goes West? And do you believe that every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings?

Chromeo is an electronic/dance duo comprised of P-Thugg (Patrick Gemayel) and Dave 1 (David Macklovitch). As their Wikipedia entry so astutely states, "The two childhood friends jokingly describe themselves as "the only successful Arab/Jewish partnership since the dawn of human culture." They became relatively well-known with the release of their second album, Fancy Footwork, which featured the singles "Fancy Footwork", " Tenderoni ", and " Bonafied Lovin' ". I personally discovered them via their song "Opening Up (Ce Soir On Danse)". "Night by Night" is the first single off Chromeo's third studio album, to be released in the summer of 2010. I don't really know how to describe it. The song is almost an '80s throw-back while simultaneously building on their discography in an organic, interesting way. It fits well in the electronic/dance genre that is becoming relatively popular (see La Roux, Ladyhawke). F...

Holy shit. Read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Melody_Gardot And then LISTEN TO HER OH MY GOD This girl (a native of Philadelphia) despite being launched by the same people as Norah Jones, blows her out of the water. And to read what she goes through each day is simply heartbreaking. And inspiring. And humbling. all her tracks are streamable on last.fm, if you like smoky, mature jazz. this girl is TALENTED. She recently opened for Diana Krall on her tour in New Zealand. this girl is going to be HUGE. she has to be. if people have, like, taste. I recommend "Your Heart is as Black as Night."

Asalaam and good afternoon. With the dawn of 010 (pronounced oh-ten) approaching, a whole new list of resolutions is being created, one of them is to create a new recognized musical Sub-Genre. And here it is.......... Plastic Rose Rock This is a sub genre that incorporates music that is meant to be glam, but is created with no heart and soul. Like a plastic rose, it is flashy and attractive on the outside, but inside it's dead....and was never alive to begin with. The creation of this genre comes from a lyrical line in the first single from "Selena Gomez and the Scene's" Debut song....The roses that you gave me were made of plastic. I know, I complain about Selena Gomez wayyyyyyyyyyy too much. And you might be tired of hearing about her, but this is important. Her album out now "Kiss and Tell" is the prime example of Plastic Rose Rock. It is trying to be sold on imagery and very fabricated songs. Like I said, flashy but no life in it. QATFYG: Who else would ...

I know Al created a stir when he talked about how he didn't get the fuss surrounding the "Single Ladies" video. I think one needs to have a moment with Beyonce. which I really had this morning, let me tell you. HOW DID I NOT HEAR ALL OF THIS SONG BEFORE TURN THE LIGHTS ON I am officially a Beyonce fan. I will revel in this.

Guided By Voices Robert Goulet. The cast of The Mighty Ducks . a block of cheese Ariana Huffington ------------- I'm still confused. a Swedish supermodel is far superior to any of these people. or anyone that would be on Tool Academy.

Because I fell behind!! "French Navy"- Camera Obscura strikes me as classic Camera Obscura . I was really shocked this came off their latest album. O_______________________O so happy! worth a listen. "Never Had Nobody Like You"- M. Ward good summer song. featuring Zooey on back-up. aw. very laidback . "Dying In Africa"- Sally Shapiro hyped-up ambient cover of an Italian disco (is that why they call it? Italopop ?) song. I've heard the original is way better but I can't help but love this because I loved it first. LISTEN TO IT WITH THE LIGHTS OFF. "No You Girls"- Franz Ferdinand I wrote about this record a long time ago (when the blog was first new! HA) and how much I enjoyed it. then I played it to death. but there are still some upstanding tracks to be had. except Franz Ferdinand will never be as good as they could be. :( "Gimme Sympathy"- Metric Pretty awesome that Metric, at long last, finally released a GOOD album. I mean t...

sometimes you read something and it pegs how you feel. "To his lost lover" Simon Armitage Now they are no longer any trouble to each other he can turn things over, get down to that list of things that never happened, all of the lost unfinishable business. For instance… for instance, how he never clipped and kept her hair, or drew a hairbrush through that style of hers, and never knew how not to blush at the fall of her name in close company. How they never slept like buried cutlery – two spoons or forks cupped perfectly together, or made the most of some heavy weather – walked out into hard rain under sheet lightning, or did the gears while the other was driving. How he never raised his fingertips to stop the segments of her lips from breaking the news, or tasted the fruit or picked for himself the pear of her heart, or lifted her hand to where his own heart was a small, dark, terrified bird in her grip. Where it hurt. Or said the right thing, or put it in writing. And never ...

In an unsurprising twist of events, Erie is expecting a bad snowstorm today (go here ). Aw, okay. On my way back here, walking through the snow and wind (!) I was reminded of the countless other times I've walked like this. and had the spirit sucked slowly out of me by this infernal weather. but then my beat-up little iPod put on Beirut's "Postcards From Italy," which was my favorite song my freshman year, and all the snow-battles in the past I've endured thanks to the triumph of this song. it was lovely. even though I came home with hands that were freezing and snot running from my nose and an aching body that just wanted a bed, it was a kind of nice full circle thing, to realize how close I am to the actualization of leaving this place. "Postcards From Italy"- Beirut another song that helps "Neighborhood #1 (Kettles)"- Arcade Fire (who are releasing a new album come May) In other free stuff, there is a holiday sampler featuring artists I whol...

My current music love is These New Puritans , an indie post-punk band from the UK. Their music is certainly unique, especially as far as indie music is concerned - featuring sounds ranging from Japanese Taiko drums, swords, and a brass and woodwind ensemble - and all of their music videos have a stark, cinematic feel to them. (Watch Elvis and Swords of Truth on YouTube.) "We Want War" (video above) is the first single off their new album, Hidden, to be released January 18. Coming in at over seven minutes, it's a truly epic single. Jack Barnett's haunting vocals combined with a brass orchestra and a children's choir create a haunting atmosphere, and the music video - featuring members of the band diving into water against a backdrop that ranges from pure black to a distorted city outline - is stunning, almost apocalyptic in a way. I recommend you check out this song ASAP.

So in this day and age it is hard to find people that are rather exceptional. That is why Eric Millegan earns the s/s for this week. You may have seen him on “Bones,” and you may have seen his traveling cabaret show. But Eric Millegan does far more than act. He has been an open homosexual, and not only that he has come out three times. 1. homosexuality 2. About his Age 3. For his mental illness As for his age, Eric Millegan is 35, and he looks like he is 19ish. But he even stated he had to come out with his age and admit that he is older than he looks. Much more courageous, than that goomba mcgoomba, Jason Earles from Hannah Montana, who refuses to admit that he’s 33. But now Eric Millegan is an open advocate for Mental Illness Awareness, Eric has bipolar disorder, but he does not let it get him down anymore. As an actor, he has made it onto many network television shows, but he has been battling mental illness the whole time. Eric now has a series of youtube videos explaining what it’...

I like Bass Players. This guy is impressivo. Jayen Varma from India holds the world record as the world’s fastest bass player, playing up to 36 notes a second. See if you count to 36 in one second. jayen varma His stuff is listed as nontraditional, but it doesn't sound at all like western music. I'm not a super huge fan of his arrangements, but his abilities trump all that silly nonsense. QATFYG: Do you like Indian music? Do you like Fast or Slow (not a serious question)? And how fast can you count to 36?

Ryan Bingham (George Clooney) is a corporate downsizer - a man who fires people for a living. He spends his life in isolation, traveling from place to place, never making connections, never settling down. He takes pleasure in the little things, such as the mints on the pillows in his hotel rooms. The film examines a man who has nothing and nobody - and what happens when he begins to fall in love with someone just like him (Vera Farmiga). Based on 2001 novel of the same name by Walter Kirn and directed by Jason Reitman (of "Juno" and "Thank You for Smoking" fame), "Up in the Air" has been enjoying great critical success: currently it has an 89% "Fresh" rating on RottenTomatoes. I think the film looks intriguing, though I'm not sure how well it will do commercially. The idea of solitude and isolation while surrounded by others is a theme I find very fascinating, but I can't help but think it won't resonate very well with theater-goers. ...

I had almost forgotten about everyone's 2nd favorite Rapcore/Rap Metal badasses. I was just listening to some old Bionic Jive. Almost as good as ICE T's Body Count. "I shot lucifer" by Bionic Jive --this is so extreme. This is me, Black and most hated in all fifty, from genocide to swastikas and right wing comittees, This is me, the witness to governmental conspiracies, overcrowded cells breed addicts to feed my street This is me, the one the aryan nation wanna touch, burn my church, set me up, hog tie, and wet me up, and at the same time my own block hold a nine and a bullet with my name in case I go against the grain America sleeps, while children play with cyber sex, and my neighbor's hard to love cuz I know he child molests Money manifest the greed, greed manifest the murder, murder manifest revenge to hold the cycle of the sins But I shot Lucifer, Christ compelled me, Christ compelled me, we bring the truth to life I shocked the world with it, shocked the wor...

so i was a little out of my mind when I wrote that last post about nick jonas. and i called his brother kevin, and "ug*y douc*ebag" and his fiancee a "C*ntS*ck" I was out of line, and I retract these comments. However, Kevin you're still low on my list. Somethings are set in stone!!!

We passed the time with crosswords that she thought to bring inside What five letters spell "apocalypse?" she asked me I won her over saying "W.W.I.I.I." She smiled and we both knew that she'd misjudged me. Oh, Marie it was so easy to fall in love with you It felt almost like a home of sorts or something And you would keep the warhead missile silo good as new And I'd watch you with my thumb above the button. "The Temptation of Adam." p.s. if you're at PSB tonight, Pittsburgh's the Clarks are playing!

You may remember my post about the band Yeasayer. I believe I mentioned that they would be releasing a new single and album within the next few months. Well, that was back in August, and that time has come. Well, sort of. "Ambling Alp" is the first single release from their sophomore album "Odd Blood," which will be released in February 2010. Ambling Alp is epic. Seriously. I wasn't really impressed with the song the first time I heard it, but it has blown up on repeat listens. I mean, I've listened to this song maybe twenty times in a row. It's ridiculous. Check the music video out (posted above). It's visually stunning. Plus, whoever came up with the concept was seriously high, because this shit is trippy, man. I love it. For that matter, even my mother loves this song! And she is a woman of discerning taste. Her favorite lyric is, "Now, the world can be an unfair place at times, but your lows will have their complement of highs." That...

Guess What? Guess What? Guess What? It's official we are going to have "Bloodrayne 3!" And it is starring the poorly reviewed actress Kristianna Loken. She was the lead in the first "Bloodrayne" movie, and it flopped like E.D. , so they replaced her with some other tooter (Natassia Malthe.) But I guess that flopped even worse, so Kristianna has her job back as the sexual star of vampire whoredom. "Bloodrayne 3" is going to appear sometime in 2010, and no, I most likely will not go see it. The reason is KL is the spotlight/shoutout diva/queen bitch of the week is because after she was nominated for "Worst Actress of the Year" at the Golden Raspberries (for Bloodrayne) , I meant to write a stage play for her, so she could jumpstart her career on the underground artsy circuit. I never wrote it, but I imagined it would be about 3 women who drink a lot of champagne. And since I didn't help her with her career then, this is the least I can do.(...

I really hate myself for liking Owl City as much as I do. he's like a castrated Postal Service- something fluffy and totally harmless. gave his album on last.fm a listen. not amazing, but pop radio loves it and sometimes you need that guilty pap, like cotton candy for your ears. I prefer "Hello Seattle."'' And Sofia Talvik, Swedish pop star in making (fingers crossed!) - with the 1st of December- has her "Christmas calendar" well under way. ? I'm still confused as to what that's about, but you can check it out at her website: www.sofiatalvik.com . there's some free music on it and she really isn't bad at all. FRIEND HER ON FACEBOOK DAMMIT! Here's her cover of Leonard Cohen's immortal "Hallelujah," which was perfected by Jeff Buckley (RIP) but eh what can you do: Today is World AIDS Day. It's weird: breast cancer gets a month and AIDS just a day. Lastly, to close off on a good note, our imaginary girlfriend Zooey ...